On today’s show we heard about the woman who found a complete rat’s head in her fried chicken. Yummy!

And we also had news of the woman in Devon who somehow managed to call police in Barnstable, Massachusetts to report a car accident between the rural villages of Muddiford and Ilfracombe. She was informed that there might be a bit of a delay before officers could attend the incident.

See you next time,
Scott 

On the first ONE-2-THREE show of the week, we revelled in the story of the man denied a reserved seat on a train because 4 overweight passengers were taking up the space normally used to accommodate 5 people, but refused to move!

We also had news of the woman who’s review for a washing machine went down more of a storm than she could ever have expected due to the picture she posted of the machine, which showed her reflection dressed only in a skimpy pair of knickers. Enjoy!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

On what was, for me, another bonus edition of the show, we heard about Google’s efforts to protect the anonymity of a cow and about the 17-stone woman who’s been told that her weight was the cause of damage to a sofa less than a year old.

Nothing more to say!

See you next week,
Scott

Sadly Margaret Mills is still indisposed but we hope she will be back with us again soon.

In the meantime, on today’s show we heard a selection of reasons why people managed to get fired on their first day at work.

Posting a sex manual to a 5-year old in place of the Paddington book she was expecting proved to be a good start!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Today we heard about the reluctant Norwegian politician, who despite his best efforts has been elected to serve on his local council for two years.

His poster showing him with his cat, even asked people not to vote for him.

Perhaps there are some lessons there for budding politicians here!

We also heard about the convenience store in London trying to stay open for longer than anyone else. They claim to be open 25-hours a day but they’ve still got someway to beat the discount outlet claiming to be open 9-days a week!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Yeah, it’s yet another bonus show for me today and so we looked at the confectionary machine at a Spanish seaside resort that also dispenses a whole range of sex toys, all of which are clearly displayed alongside hot and cold drinks, packs of chewing gum and other treats for the kids.

Be careful which tray you pull out!

Meanwhile in Barking it seems there is a shop with, what must be “THE SALE OF THE CENTURY.”

Seemingly if you buy one shoe, they will throw in the other one for FREE. Now that’s what I call a bargain!

See you next week,
Scott

On today’s for me bonus edition of the show we took delight in one man’s misfortune and of a woman trying for a world record.

First off we had news of the man who got trapped in a loo. But when we say “IN” we really mean “IN”. As this Norwegian feller literally dived into a loo to try to retrieve the phone his friend had accidentally dropped into said orifice.

Unfortunately he became firmly wedged as he stood thigh deep in the contents and had to spend an hour completely enclosed in the small area. Whilst trapped he was bitten a number of times by some creatures apparently inhabiting this idyllic spot.

Mr Larsen was only released from his ordeal after firefighters destroyed the facility.

Oh and in case you’re wondering his quest to retrieve the phone proved unsuccessful.

Next up came news of Fort Worth resident, Monica Riley,  a 50 stone woman bidding to become the world’s fattest and heaviest woman and aiming to hit the scales at 70 stone within the next 5 years.

Helping her to achieve her dream, boyfriend Sid prepares a special night time shake for her to drink through a funnel.

The shake consists of ten Pop Tarts, heavy-duty cream, ice cream, milk and weight-gain power, totalling 3,500 calories.

The nightly funnel feeding is streamed live to 20,000 fans on line.

Perhaps Donald Trump could enlist her to block off the Texan border with Mexico.

I’m off for a snack now. See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Unfortunately Margaret Mills is rather poorly just now but hopefully she will be back with us before too long but JULIAN WHYBRA bravely stepped into the breach today to tell us all about The Muster Roll of 1539 and the horrors resulting from the Marian Persecutions between the years of 1555 and 1558 and how these two events impacted on the inhabitants of Billericay.

You can listen again to what Julian told me by clicking on the link below:-

You can also read all about these two events in more detail in a book Julian has written called Billericay People Volume I THE  MUSTER ROLL 1539 AND THE MARIAN PERSECUTIONS 1555-58. 

It’s available from the Cater Museum in Billericay who will benefit from all the profits derived from sales and can be yours for just £9:75.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

For my first day back after my holiday, I thought it appropriate to look at two stories loosely connected with travelling and holiday issues.

First up if you were thinking of travelling to Pakistan, you might want to slip by Peshawar, where at the Khyber Rifles Officers Mess at Landi Kotal you can see a Banyan tree that was placed under arrest more than a century ago, on the orders of a serving British military officer, who in his drunken state believed it to be trying to run away.

The tree remains chained to the ground to this very day!

Closer to home, should you take a trip to Paris, just be warned that you could be in line for a massive fine should you be reckless enough to take a photograph of the Eiffel Tower at night. You are particularly at risk if you then publish said photo on line. The reason seems to be because the tower’s nightly light display is classified as a separate “artistic installation” and protected by copyright.

You have been warned!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

On today’s One 2 Three my guests were Paul Dorling and Dave Jones talking about their upcoming poetry recital at The Brentwood Theatre entitled “A Crossing”.

Dave Jones and Paul Dorling

Described as “a journey within and without” I was looking forward to finding out more.

You can listen to our chat here –

We cover all sorts of subjects here on 123 and today was no different. Martyn Williams the director of the latest production from Thurrock Courts Players came into the studio to chat to Mike about The Ghost Train which is on at the Thameside Theatre in September

You can here the interview again here

Stuart Smith is raising money for St Lukes Hospice. How? By walking on the wings of an aircraft . Why? He explains all to Mike

You can here the interview again here

Fantastic to be joined by Simon Sheehan, Simon Cantwell and Paul Nooney (along with his Hofner Bass) from The Solo Beatles today.

Simon Sheehan, Simon Cantwell and Paul Nooney

The Solo Beatles are a 5 piece band who play the music of John, Paul, George and Ringo after they went their separate ways. Songs like Got My Mind Set On You, My Love, Photograph, Just Like Starting Over, Band On The Run, My Sweet Lord and Imagine. Although the guys were 2 members short today they played us a lovely “stripped down” version of John Lennon’s Imagine. We also heard a couple of live recordings of the band and I challenged Paul’s encyclopaedic knowledge of The Beatles with a short quiz. You can listen to the entire session here –

The Solo Beatles will be performing at The Essex Arms in Brentwood next Saturday 3rd September at 8pm. See you there!

The Solo Beatles Website

Facebook

Twitter

The Brentwood Cancer Support and Survivorship Group gets under way on the 5th of September at The Toby Carvery in Ingrave Road near Shenfield Common.
Dr Eric Watts joined me today to tell us all about it.

Dr Eric Watts

You can listen to our chat here –

Yes, today came news of the house turned into a reasonable facsimile of a cell in the old MAZE prison by a robot vacuum cleaner, with the help of a puppy, who someone had forgotten to let out before everyone went to bed.

The puppy pooped on the carpet and the robot acted as a homegrown muck spreader.

Oh dear!

On today’s Bygones feature Margaret Mills told us the all about the legend attaching to Deadman’s Lane in Galleywood.

If you missed it you can catch it all again by clicking on the link below: –

See you next time,
Scott

First off today we heard about two men in Germany arguing over a parking incident which resulted in one of the combatants attacking the other man’s car with a sausage. We also had news of a brawl involving a sausage roll in Bristol and a shareholder’s meeting disrupted – again over sausages.

Must be something in the meat!

We also had news of the killer granny in Russia, who it seems has cut up, cooked and eaten her tenant, husband, mother-in-law and someone she was caring for.

You’d have thought she’d miss the income.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Great to talk to award winning actor Wendy Morgan about the new production of Made in Dagenham The Musical starting next week at The Queens Theatre Hornchuch

Wendy Morgan

You can listen to our chat (with added ice cream van effects!) here –

You can find out more at the Queens theatre’s website which is www.queens-theatre.co.uk, or you can get tickets from the box office on 01708 443333.

Well I suppose it was only a matter of time, but yes a Russian woman claims to have been raped by a Pokemon Go character.

She claims that she had been playing the game before going to sleep only to wake up to find a huge Pokemon on top of her, raping her which promptly  disappeared when she got out of bed, although the app showed that the character was indeed still on her bed.

Her husband has suggested she sees a psychiatrist so at least some sanity still exists in that household.

Later in the programme we heard the history of Brentwood’s Marygreen Manor from Margaret Mills.

If you missed it just click on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

Today we heard about two felons who maybe should try something else.

First off came news of man who’s life of crime has never paid off as he always gets caught. But he must have thought his luck had changed when at 4am he stumbled upon an unlocked car with the keys still in the ignition and and iPad and wallet just sitting there for the taking.

All he had to do was reach in and he would be quids in.

Unfortunately our hero got in the car and in his drug clouded mind, inadvertently pressed the door-lock button on the key fob and then couldn’t understand how the doors had seemingly locked by themselves, imprisoning him in the vehicle.

In a blind panic he smashed a car window to make good his escape and then whilst trying to use a credit card from the wallet he’d just pinched, was picked up on CCTV.

Then we heard about the would-be bank robber armed with a knife, who told the cashier to deposit £500 into his own account.

When that didn’t work he ran down to another bank nearby and demanded the money in cash, but they didn’t have that much in the till.

Unsurprisingly he was quickly apprehended and has now been sentenced to 2 years at Her Majesty’s pleasure.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

We all know that tax is a necessary evil, and hope that everyone gets to pay their fair share, but one man from Bristol was astonished to receive a recent bill from HMRC for £14 Trillion!

The notice from HMRC said: “Although we are changing your tax code you may still not pay enough tax by 5 April 2017. We think the amount you owe HMRC is £14,301,369,864,489.03p
That is fourteen trillion, three hundred and one billion, three hundred and sixty nine million, eight hundred and sixty four thousand, four hundred and eighty nine pounds and three pence.
Fortunately, the taxman acknowledged the error. Mr Hembrough said: “I gave HMRC a ring and said to the woman that I thought my code was wrong. “When she opened my file she said ‘Oh that is a big amount – it looks like someone has fallen asleep on the keyboard!'”

Today we learnt about the dentist who lost a tool during an operation.

It emerged later that the patient had swallowed it.

Not surprisingly the patient sued the dental practice but as this was in the US it is perhaps surprising that the dentist didn’t try to sue the patient for theft!

On our Bygones feature this week, Margaret Mills took us to Copford where at the time of Queen Mary a bishop, known locally as Bloody Bishop Bonner, is said to have stashed away all his worldly goods in a tunnel leading from the church.

In spite of many searches, nothing has so far been uncovered so presumably, if it ever existed it is still waiting to be found.

Listen again to what Margaret told me by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

We heard today of the antics of two council authorities.

First off we had news of Havering Council allegedly threatening to take a pensioner to court for criminal damage due to his wilful attack on a council owned lawn outside his house armed with a lawn mower.

Presumably this was thought to be a cut too far!

Meanwhile in Northamptonshire intense excitement is being stirred up amongst residents following news of an adult education course explaining how to wear a scarf!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Dancing on the radio then! Well I’ll try anything…

Donna Wicks

Donna Wicks is a lovely lady who is using her passion for dancing and making people smile, to raise money for small charities.

Donna started her dancing marathon back in January and is doing a dance a day for an entire year. The videos of the dances are all posted on Youtube.

We chatted about how it all started before the big dance in the studio. A big thank you to Michelle Ward for driving the desk and Michelle’s guest for the day Leigh Luscious who stayed on for a dance too! Thanks also to Courtney-Lee Collins for the Photos and video. You can listen to the entire chat and dance here –

Or watch the video here –

You can donate here

Donna’s Facebook

Bob with Leigh Luscious and Donna Wicks

No Comment!

On today’s show we heard all about the Shetland Pony that broke into a pub in Gravesend – the aptly named ASCOT ARMS – in fact, and helped itself to the booze.

It was finally lured out with copious quantities of nibbles.

On a completely different tack we heard from Margaret Mills about an alleged witch rejoicing in the somewhat unkind name of GOOFY MUMFORD from Howe Street near Finchingfield. “Goofy” was the village schoolmistress, but also reputedly dabbled in witchcraft and so was blamed when the harvest failed, killed and then buried at a crossroads.

To hear more click on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

Courtney-Lee

I’ve really enjoyed my time at Phoenix FM. I was really lucky to work with a range of presenters during my work experience and I found it so useful and really interesting as I saw how each presenter put their own spin on their individual shows.

Courtney-Lee and Bob

All of the presenters were so helpful and friendly and many let me try out presenting features on their shows from the events guide to showbiz news to traffic, I was even lucky enough to have my very own 20 minute Courtney-Lee takeover during one show where I took over the airwaves to play my favourite songs all by myself. I’d really like to thank every presenter I worked with but an extra special thank you goes to Bob Simpson who had so much faith in me that he let me ‘fly solo’ lol.

Courtney-Lee and Keith Rogers

I’d recommend Phoenix to anyone looking for work experience as its a friendly atmosphere and so interesting to learn about such a great form of art. I really hope to work with Phoenix FM again in the future

Courtney-Lee x

Courtney-Lee with Steve Robertson

Phoenix FM Chairman Paul Golder with Courtney-Lee

The children’s store Piccola in Brentwood High Street are turning 50! You can join them in their celebrations along with guests Peppa Pig, George and Peter Rabbit! Their V.I.P guests will be appearing throughout the day at both Brentwood and Epping branches on Saturday 30th July.

I was very pleased to welcome Simon Wilson from Piccola today to tell us all about their celebrations.

Simon and Bob

You can listen to our chat here –

Happy Birthday Piccola! You can find out more on the Piccola website here

or their Facebook page here

I’ll be honest with you once computer games moved on from Space Invaders I lost all interest so I’m totally baffled by the latest phenomenon POKEMON GO.

The addicts of such games however seem to allow themselves to be completely taken over by them as evidenced by a journalist at the White House, who rather than concentrate on the briefing of how ISIS would be defeated, tried to carry on playing POKEMON GO.

Whether or not US policy as outlined will eventually defeat Daesh, the reporter’s efforts to catch the Pokemon were defeated by a poor signal. 

Just glad he had his priorities right!

On today’s Bygones feature Margaret Mills looked back at the man they named twice – Sir John Griffin Griffin Whitwell. He had to get named “GRIFFIN” twice in order to inherit Audley End.

If you missed what Margaret said you can listen again here: –

See you again soon,
Scott

Do the bugs keep biting you on these warm nights?

Well now we have the answer to your problems thanks to a group of Swedish scientists.

Yes apparently all you have to do is take a live hen to bed with you and the mosquitoes will leave you alone.

Whatever else that’s a very different suggestion from the kind of bedfellows usually suggested by  Swedes!

Keeping to theme of wildlife, we also reported on the psychopathic swan terrorising people going about their hobby with model boats at a lake in Suffolk.

One man likened an attack on his craft to a battle with the German warship BISMARCK during the second world war!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

We are proud of the fact that we are constantly trying to further the career of young raw local talent and today was no exception. 15 year old Anna Marie Childs hails from Grays and has been singing since she was 11. She visited the studio today with Mike and played 3 songs of her own material

You can hear the interview again here

There is also a youtube link

What a lovely way to spend part of an afternoon, in the company of Richie and Bill!

Bill and Richie

We caught up with what they had been up to in the months since they last came into Phoenix including Richie’s presence at  a certain tea party at Buckingham Palace. Along with that Richie and Bill performed four songs for us with a bonus track from one of Bill’s albums. For one of the tracks I accompanied them on the washboard – not to be missed that one! You can listen to the entire session, and quite a few laughs, here –

The Bob Simpson Washboard Trio

Bill and Richie with Her Majesty The Queen (Possibly)

My thanks to Richie Milton and Bill Farrow for another wonderfully entertaining session. Always a pleasure.

Richie’s Website is here

Bill’s is here

and their alter-ego’s website (Bill ‘N Ricky) is here

You can catch Richie Milton and Bill Farrow performing at The Spread Eagle Brentwood on 6th August.

Today came news of the man from Bodmin banned from swearing anywhere in the UK for 3 years but that’s OK then, if he goes to the Channel Islands or the Isle of Man he can swear as much as he likes.

How are they going to enforce this ruling, I wonder.

He’s just been released from prison for disruptive behaviour so as he hasn’t been sent back perhaps he was found to be too disruptive behind bars and that other inmates were caused unnecessary harassment, alarm and distress!

On today’s Bygones feature, Margaret Mills related the strange story of the Devil’s handprint at Steeple.

If you missed it listen again here:-

See you again next week,
Scott

Well – yes I’m back but with a horrendous cough, so keep well back from your radios.

Just hope I can rid myself of the cough before the end of the world – now scheduled for Friday week, would you believe? At least I got my holiday in first!

Yes, apparently undeterred by many earlier false predictions of doom, END TIMES PROPHESIES insist that the world will end on 29th July, when they claim that the Earth’s magnetic poles will reverse and an extremely angry Jesus Christ will return and kill all non Christians who watch a lot of videos on YouTube.

No BBQ’s that weekend then!

We also had news of the pensioner accused of defacing a work of art valued at £87,000. It seems that she became confused whilst visiting an art exhibition which included interactive exhibits, so when she came saw a crossword puzzle which included the the instruction ” insert words”, she did using a ballpoint pen!

Wonderful stuff! See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Recently, I had the opportunity to work at Phoenix Fm for a week of work experience. It was a very entertaining and enjoyable experience which enabled me to explore what the “world of radio” is like.

Gabi

The opportunity to work in the studio for 7 hours a day allowed me to work with various presenters on their different radio shows. I also was in the studio for various interviews during the week which gave me an insight into how they work and the logistics of them. I would describe myself as quite shy, but being here in such an encouraging environment allowed me to “come out of my shell” and I was even able to read the Phoenix Events Announcements and become more comfortable with talking on air as the week progressed.

I came into the studio at different hours each day and spent time on the Breakfast Show with Mike Porter which gave me an understanding of how the radio shows were organised with the weather and traffic.

I also joined Michelle Ward on her show “Eat My Brunch” and had a lot of fun everyday, if it was just having a chat or having a joking about on air, Michelle created a lovely atmosphere where we could talk about music and eat lots of chocolate!

Gabi and Michelle

During the week, I let it slip that my Driving Theory Test was coming up and Bob Simpson arranged a small “Mock Driving Test” for me to answer on air which was very funny and amusing. Bob also let me read the Entertainment News which despite being nervous about it allowed me to feel much more confident talking on the air.

In Keith Rogers’ ‘Drive’ show, in association with Intu Lakeside, was extremely enjoyable because I was allowed to pick the year for the Retro chart and pick the songs to play from this chart. I was also able to read the top 5 songs for the chosen Retro chart year. I loved doing this because it enabled me to explore a wider range of music, (some older music that I had no idea about), and I could then go home and look up the artists that I didn’t know and I’d heard being talked about during the day.

Gabi and Keith

I would really recommend looking for work experience at Phoenix Fm or any other radio station because it gives you a new-found confidence that I would other wise not have gained. It was such a good week and I have now decided that I would love a career in based in media especially radio!

Prostate Cancer is the commonest major cancer in UK men and second commonest cause of cancer deaths with 47,000 new registrations and 11,000 deaths each year.

CHAPS is a registered charity which aims to raise awareness and support the development of new health services directly targeted at men’s needs to enable them to take care of their own health and well being. Joining me today from Chaps was Clinical Director Chris Booth.

Chris Booth

You can listen to our chat here –

The CHAPS website is here

What’s going on with our weather? Maybe like me you are still waiting for summer to arrive. If so there may be good news on the horizon. A report in the Metro states that from today the British summer could finally be upon us, with a little help from the Spanish.
A ‘Spanish plume’ of very hot air, heading to the UK in the middle of July, could see six weeks of 30°C temperatures.
That’s all very well until you look at the actual weather forecast! Thunder, torrential downpours and below average temperatures. Oh well, at least the rain will be fairly warm.
Although Scott was away today he did make a brief audio appearance on the show in the regular Bygones feature, talking to Margaret Mills about Merrymeade House in Brentwood. You can listen to that again here –

Merrymeade House

It was an incredible delight and an honour to speak to Duke Fakir, the last surviving member of the original Four Tops. In the interview Duke talks about the early days growing up in Detroit and forming a group with his best friend Levi Stubbs, the transition to Motown and how The Four Tops continue today with a new line up.

Today’s Four Tops with Duke

You can listen to the interview here –

I had this album!

The Four Tops will be touring the UK in October along with The Temptations and Tavarez. Full details of the tour can be found here

Following the success of the Billericay Summerfest in 2015 that saw over 6,000 people visit Sun Corner and £4,000 raised for charity, the Rotary Club of Billericay Mayflower will again be presenting the event for 2016.
Today my guests were Nick Sillitoe and Yvonne Kyndt from the Rotary Club of Billericay Mayflower who came in to tell us all about this great local community event happening on Sunday.

Yvonne and Nick

You can listen to our chat here –

For more details on Billericay Summerfest click here

We heard today about blushing cinema staff who played a trailer for an adult movie to kids who were expecting to see the sequel to Pixar’s 2003 smash hit, Finding Nemo.

They were no doubt astonished and curious to find themselves regaled with a trailer for the adult animated comedy – SAUSAGE PARTY – incorporating some very X-rated language.

Can you imagine the questions their parents had to face on the way home?

For our Bygones feature this week Margaret Mills took us to Hutton Poplars Hall.

Carmel Jane Photography

Listen again to what Margaret told me about the fascinating history behind this building by clicking on the link below: –

See you next time,
Scott

On today’s programme we heard about 2 men employed by a local council in Spain who’ve managed to skive off work for 15 years but still collected their full pay packets.

Amazingly several members of the local police department have also been found not to be pulling their weight – in the last year one had worked just 96 days, another for 66 days and one person had go away with working for a mere 47 days.

I think I’m in the wrong job!

Meanwhile it seems that a TV remote control designed to be used by dogs is about to hit the market.

So you could soon be finding someone else will be fighting over the remote – and this one might bite!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

What better way to spend my summer break than behind the mic at Phoenix FM!

Nearing the end of my two weeks here at Phoenix, I can well and truly say I have thoroughly enjoyed every minute, and for those of you who have yet to experience radio from behind the mic, here’s a glimpse of what you’ve been missing.

After just an hour in the studio the lovely Michelle Ward handed me a pair of headphones and positioned me in front of a mic, which for someone with no background in radio was daunting to say the least. For the next 3 hours I was live on Michelle Ward’s Eat My Brunch show. Talk about throwing me in at the deep end Michelle!

Michelle and Paige

The beauty of being in the studio 7 hours a day was that I could work with numerous presenters, all of which had different styles and shows. Every day from 3pm I worked with Keith Rogers who assigned me the task of selecting the retro charts. If you’d have asked me who Talk Talk were prior to Keith’s shows I’d have thought you were referring to the TV and Broadband provider, so Keith’s shows have certainly educated me about music before the likes of Drake and Ariana Grande.

Paige and Keith

Throughout my first week I also had the pleasure of working with the one and only Scott Ross, from his humorous stories to his quoted T-shirts there was never a dull moment with Scott in the studio. Just two days into my first week Scott tasked me with preparing a list of interview questions for his guest Stuart Carr. The Essex born singer-songwriter didn’t perform any live tracks but during my second week I was fortunate enough to see: Falling under, Infrared Penguin and Holloway Road perform live on Michelle’s Eat My Brunch.

Stuart Carr with Scott

Without a doubt the highlight of my time here at Phoenix has been meeting and working with such welcoming people. From day one the presenters made me feel at home which eased my nerves and enabled me to focus on and more importantly enjoy the job in hand.

Bob and Paige

I would highly recommend Phoenix FM to anyone interested in a future in radio, or any aspect of the media for that matter. The skills and knowledge I have gained during the last two weeks will almost certainly prove beneficial to me, not only in the short term as I finish my Journalism degree, but in the long term when job seeking. I cannot thank Chairman Paul Golder along with all the Phoenix FM presenters enough for this fantastic opportunity, it has been an absolute pleasure.

The country is in turmoil. We’re leaving the EU, The Prime Minister has resigned, The Labour Party is imploding, social media is full of very angry people, the financial markets are in shock, Barry Gibb performs with Coldplay, The England team forgets how to play football, and floods of biblical proportion. And all while I was away in Cornwall.

But it’s OK. I’m back now, calm down everyone. Let’s do some slow deep breathing exercises…

IN………… OUT……… IN………. OUT……………….

No wait, that’s how we got into this mess in the first place!

Yes the title says it all!

A computerised robot is on the loose.

The Promobot IR77  has been fitted with artificial intelligence meaning that it learns from its experiences and its surroundings, but in spite of being twice re-programmed one of the machines keeps making a bid for freedom and was found wandering in the street after escaping from the hi-tech lab where it had been created. It was only stopped when the battery ran down.

Strangely none of the other similar machines has shown any sign of trying to break free. 

On this week’s BYGONES feature Margaret Mills kept to the subject she was covering last week – Essex Folklore Cures. This week she looked at headache cures. Listen to what Margaret told me by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Can you imagine being forced to sell your car because you can no longer afford the insurance premium which has only risen due to a clerical error on the part of the DVLA?

Well this is reportedly what’s happened a 56-year old former police officer with 40 years experience behind the wheel.

After moving house, Sidney Iliffe, sent off his paper and photo-card licences to register his new address only to receive a provisional licence in return. When he complained he was told that there were no records of his ever having passed the driving test which he did aged 18 back in 1975.

Meanwhile over in Sweden comes news of the footballer handed a red card for breaking wind during a match. The referee accused him of “deliberate provocation” and “unsportsmanlike behaviour”. 

A red card seems a bit over the top to me.

Now I could understand a “brown” one!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Former director Gerry Hanning called Mike today to update and inform with the latest news at what exactly is happening at Victoria road

You can hear the interview again here

On today’s show I was privileged to welcome local singer, songwriter, STUART CARR.

For most of his life Stuart has lived in Southend. Soon after being given a guitar at the age of 15 Stuart started writing music and by 18 was apprenticed to hit songwriters Arnold, Martin and Morrow and by 19 he’d had his first hit in Quebec and France.

In 1975, still at the tender age of 21 he was working with David Walker, Phil Wainman and John Goodison, plugging and writing songs for the likes of Mud, Sweet and the Bay City Rollers.

But the crossover to performing himself came after he started working closely with X-Factor contestant, Rhydian.

Listen here to what Stuart had to tell me today: –

In the second hour of the show we heard about the adult movie company who’ve launched a new service for blind clients.

Well they say it makes you go blind so I guess this is a kind of after sales service!

See you again next Monday,
Scott

On, what for me is a bonus edition of the show, today we took a peek at the new product, described as a “shower in your pocket”.

This is a giant sized wet wipe which it has been claimed is large enough to allow you to clean your whole body.

Just imagine trying to do that on the back seat of your car – or on the beach even!

We also heard about the man who returned to the restaurant he’d dined at the previous evening to ask for his tip back – well it was a £700 tip for a £42 meal!

See you again soon,
Scott

We heard today about the Turkish man arrested by police investigating a break-in, because he was walking in a peculiar way.

X-Rays showed that he had secreted a haul from a jewellery theft up his rear end.

Even stranger it emerged that the victim of said robbery was the X-ray machine operator.

On today’s Bygones feature Margaret Mills revealed some Essex folklore remedies for baldness.

A8A3N9 Mature businessman with bald head

If you missed them click on the link below – but don’t try these at home.

You have been warned,
Scott

The start of a very busy week for me with probably 4 shows!

Today we heard about the woman who caused more than a stir when she attempted to check up on her estranged husband’s whereabouts. Being ex military his suspicians were aroused by an electronic device wired up under the front passenger seat so the police and bomb squad evacuated the area until his partner confessed that it was not a bomb but a tracking device.

Oops!

We also reported how easy it could be for anyone to become a latter day Nostradamus by posting on Facebook. Anyone want to have a go at predicting the result of this week’s referendum once the results are in. We told you how to do this and make it appear that you have the gift of second sight.

See you again tomorrow.

There you are I’m predicting the future now!
Scott

You know those warnings telling you about TV programmes – “Contains nudity”, “Adult content”, “Strong language” etc well a newspaper in Russia is now printing warnings against news bulletins saying “may contain distortions or false information”.  Well I never would have guessed.

Meanwhile we also heard today about the man who’s been told by his local council that he’s dead and must prove he’s still alive!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

James Grant is 23 and has risked everything by launching a new algorithmic based web site to help people choose their career path and offer job opportunities.

Still in its infancy, James spoke to Mike about weavee.co.uk

You can hear the interview again here

Yes today we heard about the guaranteed winning scratch card that’s gone for auction on eBay.

Since the winning ticket is only worth £2 and postage is £5, bidding may be rather slack – but who knows?

As part of our BYGONES feature, Margaret Mills told us the story of the Baker’s Grave in Great Wakering.

If you missed it just click on the link below to listen again: –

See you next time,

Scott

Today we heard all about the unorthodox maths exam questions set by a teacher in Alabama revolving around drug dealers and gang members.

Maybe the teacher was just trying to connect with her pupils in a way they could relate to but the questions went down like the proverbial lead balloon with the parents of the 13 and 14-year olds for whom the questions were set.

Also from the States came news of the woman who bought a freezer from her neighbour only to find that it contained a surprise – the neighbour’s mother’s foot!

It is unclear where the rest of the mother might be.

See you tomorrow,
Scott

I love it when my guests arrive bearing cakes! More on that later though.

It was great to welcome back Jessica Livingston today along with daughter Mya to talk about this years Yogathon.

You can listen to our chat here –

Full details of the event are here –

Mya brought along 4 delicious cakes for me. One seems to have disappeared though! (That’s how I know they are delicious)And both Jessica and Mya “struck the yoga pose” for us!

Great pleasure to welcome back Stephen today along with wife Katie for a catch up and some songs exactly a year to the day that we last met here on Phoenix FM

Katie and Stephen

You can find out more about Stephen on his Facebook page here

Performing live in the studio

You can listen to the interview and session here

On today’s show we heard about the man who’s been told to demolish his pond, or face eviction as the pond could pose a risk to burglars!

Has the world gone mad?

Margaret Mills also took us on a trip to the place known as The Dragon’s Foot Field in Broomfield.

Listen again to what Margaret had to say on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

Today we heard some pretty smart answers some kids have come up with during exam time.

One child asked whether he’d rather be stranded on a desert island alone or with someone he hated, said if he was with someone he hated at least he’d be able to eat them whilst another asked to use the word “point” as a noun replied that he couldn’t see the point of SATS. Clever eh!

We also heard about the art exhibition where someone placed a pair of glasses on the floor to create their very own “spectacle”. Love it.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

On today’s show we heard about the woman who opted to die rather than vote for any of the candidates standing to be the next President of the United States of America.

Also in the USA, we also heard about others standing for a very different kind of election – 16 candidates, 8 men and 8 women are hoping to be crowned the kings and queens of the adult film industry and win the $1m dollar cash prize and a lucrative career.

Unlike most of the political candidates there will be little chance of any cover ups!

See you next week,
Scott

Just imagine you fix a baby sitter to look after your kids and when you get home, discover that she used your children as cover in a bank raid.

Well that’s just what a Colorado couple discovered. The woman employed to look after their children drove them to the bank, claimed that a man hiding in the back of the car had a gun trained on them that he was prepared to use if the teller didn’t hand over the loot. It subsequently emerged that the childminder needed the money to help pay off a restitution deal in respect of previous offences including 30 counts of forgery, 3 counts of ID theft and felony.

Looks like she can now add robbery and child abuse to the tally!

On today’s Bygones feature, Margaret Mills took us over to the Clacton house, known as THE CAGE.

Click on the link below for more details: –

See you tomorrow,
Scott

Saint Francis Hospice can once again deliver and collect donations now its stolen van has been returned.

The van was stolen from a driveway in the Avon Road area of Cranham in January.
It was used in Brentwood for the delivery and collection of bulky items and donations for Saint Francis Hospice
Staff at the hospice can now celebrate after a man was arrested and charged with the theft of the Ford Transit Luton Van.
The van had suffered some damage and all of the charity’s logos had been removed, but it is now back in working order.
General Manager, Michelle Nicholls, said: “We are very pleased to have it back and would like to say thank-you to everyone who helped us recover the vehicle and were so generous in offering their help to us when it was off the road.

Jesus Christ in heaven

Today we heard all about the man who has just attempted to take out a restraining order against God.

Must be a very brave, or possibly very stupid man!

Not surprisingly, even without the defendant, or his legal representative appearing in court, the case was thrown out with the judge suggesting that the plaintiff should be looking elsewhere other than the courts, for help.

Being a Tuesday, Margaret Mills popped in to tell us about the brief connection with Essex of the famed mechanical and industrial engineer, IZAMBARD KINGDOM BRUNEL.

Listen again to what Margaret said buy clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

But as well as all that music, we had time to learn about the man who’s maths equations resulted in his being questioned on suspicion of terrorism.

It seems that the suspicions of woman sitting next to him were aroused when he avoided answering her questions and then she mistook the equations he was writing as arabic text!

We also heard about the staff employed on the production line at chicken producers in the USA, allegedly having to wear nappies because they are unable to take toilet breaks, which their employers supposedly consider to be privileges.

Excuse me – must just fly!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

There was a lot going on in today’s show.
I previewed The Phoenix FM Referendum Debate. Mike Jones will be hosting a debate on Friday 27 May at 1pm with William Lloyd and Chris Hossack, respective leaders of the local REMAIN and LEAVE campaigns, and Alan Woods, editor of the Brentwood Gazette.
Then on another important EU issue I asked if it was possible that Joe and Jake could win Eurovision when the UK doesn’t seem too popular in Europe nowadays!

Also, with thanks to The Brentwood Gazette, I related a new proposal to raise money for charity locally.

A giant inflatable waterslide could run the length of Warley Hill if ambitious plans for a new fundraiser in Brentwood get off the ground.

Calls to run the 250m long slide down the town’s steepest slope have received backing from a local Cancer Research UK fundraiser.

The charity raised as much as £45,000 at its SlideRider event in North Hill, Colchester, on Bank Holiday Monday.

Between 4,000 and 5,000 people watched thrill-seekers hurl themselves down the slippery slope, with each of the 1,500 competitors having donated £15 to the charity for two slides.

Thanks to a variety of unique shops and the Essex Arms pub at the bottom, traders say a carnival atmosphere would easily be generated.

A waterslide next to a pub?

Sounds like a slippery slope to me!

Having just enjoyed a great weekend, it is curious to note that the met office actually issued an amber alert for snow for our area this weekend.

Yes it’s absolutely true.

The Met office subsequently blamed the incident on a “technical error”.

Meanwhile a TV weather forecaster made is own “technical error” when he decided to spice up his forecast of high winds by introducing a few sound effects of his own.

I think his subsequent sacking has come as a bit of a “blow” to him.

See you tomorrow,
Scott

The award winning but rarely produced musical Dr Jeckyl and Mr Hyde comes to the Brentwood Theatre courtesy of Shenfield Operatic Society. Suzanne Gunn and the good doctor David Predegia himself popped in to tell Mike Jones all about it

You can hear the interview again here

It was also the morning after the night before and Mike has spenthalf the night at the elections

You can here his report here

What a fabulous day and weekend in prospect! Today’s weather forecast was “Get the barbecue out!”

As well as two hours of great upbeat music today’s show featured a story which is going berserk on Twitter today about a bit of criminal damage brought about as an act of revenge by what appears to be a scorned lover.

A shiny white Range Rover Revere – with a starting price of £75,000 – was seen parked near Harrods in west London and daubed with angry messages.

“Cheater” was painted in bright red on both sides of the vehicle while the words, “Hope she was worth it” were marked on the rear window and bonnet. Not a good day for someone then.

Also, on my visit to the Polling Station this morning I encountered three very bored looking council officials. They told me that voting had been very slow up to then. They had another 11 hours to go.

Polling stations will be open until 10pm this evening with counts taking place over-night and results set to be announced throughout the day tomorrow. So get voting!

On today’s programme we heard that the man behind a string of hit records always used his cat to gauge if a song would make it to the charts.

And on our Bygones feature Margaret Mills told us about the folklore history of Old King Cole and his Essex connections, notably with Colchester.

Listen again by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Today we heard about the woman who asked police to check the quality of the cocaine she was selling as she wanted to be sure customers would be safe!

Unsurprisingly she didn’t get an answer but was arrested instead.

Meanwhile over in the USA a row has erupted over the name of an elementary school. It seems that the name it has had for years – THE ROBERT E LEE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL is no longer considered to be politically correct and so the school’s board decided to put the change of name to the popular vote.

Suggestions received include The Donald J Trump Elementary and the Adolf Hitler School for Friendship and Tolerance.

Ever wondered if better left well alone!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

We reported today on the 70 year old Bristol man looking for a nude cleaner “to do” for him and on the panic caused on a US university campus when a Dominican Friar, in search of a frozen yoghurt, was mistaken for a member of the KU KLUX KLAN brandishing a whip!

What a mistake to make!

See you once more next Monday,
Scott

Now to be perfectly honest I normally made myself fairly scarce during my son’s birthday parties even though they were fairly low key events with just a few of his friends around. One year we did get a lady conjuror in to entertain the kids, but it was still pretty low key. But today we reported news of the mother from Florida who hired a stripper for her 8-year old son’s birthday party.

How she’s going to follow that in years to come I wonder.

Meanwhile over in Spain comes news of parents and grandparents being involved in a brawl outside some school gates. What is the world coming to?

On today’s Bygones feature Margaret Mills told us some of the fascinating history of Greensted Church, near Ongar.

If you missed it listen again here: –

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Had fun sitting in for Scott Ross today. It was Maximum Music Monday. As a tribute to Billy Paul who has died I played his big hit, Me and Mrs. Jones as well as a lesser known Prince single that was released last year, Free Urself.

A couple of silly stories too, including one for the not so faint hearted –  a man has reported being bitten on the bum by a rat while using his toilet.

His local council in Middleton, County Cork is now warning people to watch their posteriors when they use the loo to prevent it from happening again. (A good trick if you can do that!)
Councillor Noel Collins said that an elderly man had come to him to complain about the incident which happened during flooding. It’s believed the rat got in through a broken sewer pipe.

Mr Collins added: ‘I would advise home owners to keep their toilet seats down when not in use, and to watch their posteriors.’

Also, 17 year old Tom Lo from Essex has passed his driving test at the first attempt, in spite of hitting a deer during the examination.

Tom was about 10 minutes into the test when the animal ran across a road in front of his car.

“I was picking up speed because it was a 60mph zone and all of a sudden I see a deer in front of me.

“So I hit my brake but unfortunately the deer was killed,” he says.

Amazingly, Tom passed the driving test with only two minor faults.

A great performance of some excellent songs from Stephen this afternoon.

Stephen Rudd performing live in studio 1

Stephen Rudd is a singer songwriter originally from Billericay and now based in Southend.

He has recently released the album Home Made Heartache an album recorded in his garage at home playing and programming everything himself and engineering and producing.

You can listen to the session and interview here –

You can find out more about Stephen Rudd on his website, stephenruddmusic.com

Pleased to welcome Luke Adams from Brentwood Biscotti today to talk about the latest Biscotti meetings and a few tips on how to use video successfully in marketing your business.

Luke Adams

You can Listen to our chat here –

Great to welcome Mike Sinclair from The Rotary Club of Billericay today to tell us all about The Billericay Soapbox Derby

Mike Sinclair

With over 50 entries so far this promises to be a great family fun filled Bank Holiday charity event as the Wacky Racers hurtle down the hill from Sun Corner in their home made soapbox carts.

You can listen to our chat here –

You can find more information about the event here

On today’s programme we heard about the man who, it was claimed, managed to destroy his entire company and business by mistyping some computer code. Oops!

For a time he might have considered making a trip to the so-called, SUICIDE POND in Epping Forest, which was the topic chosen for our Bygones feature this week, by Margaret Mills.

Listen again to what Margaret told me about this by clicking on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

It was good to welcome back our old friend JIM REEVE today.

Jim has just written a new book called SECRET CHELMSFORD and he popped by today to tell us all about it.

Click on the link below to hear what Jim told me: –

The book is available in Waterstones priced at £14.99 but you can get a discounted price by going to Jim’s website – http://www.jim-reeve.com

Now I guess we’ve all heard of people sleepwalking, but sleep-shopping – that’s a new one on me. Unfortunately with the advent of computers in the home it seems that it is now all too easy to do and today we heard about the man who seems to have placed an order for YAK whilst sleeping. Luckily he managed to cancel the order and credit card payment before the animal could be delivered to his apartment.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Today we heard about Lauren Jones who is studying to become a doctor – but Lauren has a problem.
She has a terrible phobia of belly buttons.

Whilst any kind of phobia is no laughing matter for the person suffering it, I couldn’t help finding this amusing. Our bodies and minds do some strange things to us sometimes and sometimes you’ve just got to laugh…
Lauren, is studying at University of Leicester, and is unable to go anywhere near belly buttons without feeling faint and nauseated.
Suffering from Omphalophobia, she is so repulsed by the idea of anyone touching her navel or their own that she gets physically sick.
Well I genuinely wish Lauren well and hope she soon overcomes this condition, and that it doesn’t get in the way of her chosen career.
I’m not sure if I suffer from Omphalophobia or not. I haven’t seen my belly button for years!

It was one of those shows today where the music seemed to take over and have a life of it’s own. A mix of current tracks and oldies that all seemed to be mean’t for each other and complimented each other. I’d like to take credit for that but it just seemed to happen!
I did find time though for a couple of stories…
Gwyneth Paltrow’s latest beauty tip is Apitherapy.

If you’re not sure what apitherapy is, the clue is in the picture. Apitherapy is used to get rid of inflammation and scarring. It involves angering bees so that they sting a person on the affected area of the body.

Sounds to me that a sting of a different kind is at work here. Possibly from her beauty therapist.

Then there was the couple who found a large smelly lump of something on a beach. It turned out to be a piece of ambergris – or ‘whale vomit’ – which is used in perfume making – potentially worth a whopping £50,000.

The couple are now in negotiations with potential buyers over the recently-found lump, which is slightly smaller than a rugby ball

Right, I’m off for a bit of beach combing!

We learnt today that apparently cats have regional accents!

Not only that but it seems that wolves, birds and even cows have them too, with a farmer from Glastonbury asserting that his cattle “moo” with a definite Somerset drawl.

Well I never!

Definitely not talking with a drawl of any kind was Margaret Mills who told us the grisly tale of the Earl of Derwentwater and his Essex connections, notably with the Petre family.

If you missed it listen again here: –

See you next time,
Scott

On today’s show we heard about two property “bargains”.

First off came news of the toilet in London available to rent for just £3000 per month. Alternatively you could consider the cheaper option of a 20-year lease for £20,000. If you are feeling flush this could perhaps be a good investment just so long as the bottom doesn’t fall out of the market, in which case it could prove to be money down the drain.

Unfortunately you’re too late to avail yourself of the next property – a shed with a 10 and a half foot frontage – which with a guide price of £48,000 finally went under the hammer for an eye watering £208,000.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

We heard today about the cat who got posted in error with a parcel of DVD’s only to end up 260 miles away from home. Seemingly no one noticed that the cat had nodded off in the box before it got mailed.

In spite of being cooped up for around 10 days,  mercifully it survived, albeit somewhat hungry and dehydrated.

On today’s BYGONES feature, Margaret Mills took us back to the 1870’s and the strange tale of the Loughton based pharmacist facing trial for murder after a large number of his customers became victims of arsenic poisoning from the talcum powder he was selling.

Listen again to what Margaret had to say on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

See you next time,
Scott

To start the working week we heard about a couple of people who might have slightly underestimated their ability to handle their alcoholic intake.

First off we heard about the Brentwood man alleged to have stripped naked, run around Wilsons Corner in the nude, calling out for his mother and then attempting to steal a police car.

A tricky one perhaps to explain away!

Then came news of the guy who became increasingly annoyed at being unable to reach a friend on his mobile. His exchange of text messages became ever more colourful as neither party would hang up so that they could communicate.

Not surprising really as it turned out he was calling his own number!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Couldn’t resist this silly story today. Farmer Adrian Potter has been conducting research to find the best music to keep his hens happy and performing at their best. After experimenting with various forms of music including classical, jazz and Justin Bieber, he discovered that they liked Ed Sheeran songs the best. He said the hens love the singer so much they even follow him around when he starts playing Ed Sheeran songs from a portable stereo on the farm. Justin Bieber must be inconsolable. I wonder if they have a Lego hen House?

We learnt today why it is sometimes wise not to send back an unsatisfactory meal at a restaurant – more especially if it happens to be of the fast food variety staffed by teenagers.

Later on Margaret Mills popped in to tell us all about the exploits of the Essex pathologist, Francis Camps who amongst other things was famous for producing evidence that convicted serial killer John Christie in the 1950’s.

If you missed it click on the link below to listen again to what Margaret told me today: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Welcome to Easter Bank Holiday Monday! Typical Bank Holiday weather, of course, but at least Friday was magnificent.

Anyway on today’s show we heard about the school kids who’ve had to answer a question about what sex they are. Simple enough one would think, but not so simple when you have 24 options to choose from, some of which I don’t even understand. Has the world gone mad or is it just me?

We also heard about the man billed 5p for a plastic bag after he filled up his car with 25 litres of fuel.

Wouldn’t it spill out of the bag?

If you are not back at work I hope to see you again tomorrow,
Scott

I wasn’t there at the start. That was around 20 years ago. I wasn’t even there at the start of 24/7 broadcasting on the 23rd March 2007. A relative newbie then and proud to have been involved with Phoenix FM for almost 5 years now.

Here’s a newspaper clipping from 5 years ago that tells the story much better than I could.

 
Anyway I thought a good way to mark the occasion would be to have a run down of the UK Top Ten from 23rd March 2007, our first day of full time broadcasting. Usually when you look back at old charts you tend to find just a couple of good songs that have stood the test of time. For our opening week though, it was a pretty good chart with only a couple of “forgotten songs” – well for me anyway. This is what I found.

23^rd March 2007 Top Ten

1.  WALK THIS WAY – SUGABABES VS GIRLS ALOUD
2. THE SWEET ESCAPE – GWEN STEFANI FT AKON
3. (I’M GONNA BE) 500 MILES – PROCLAIMERS/B POTTER/A PIPKIN
4. SHINE – TAKE THAT
5. HOW TO SAVE A LIFE – FRAY
6. RUBY – KAISER CHIEFS
7. GRACE KELLY – MIKA
8. WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND – JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE
9. THE CREEPS – CAMILLE JONES
10. ACCEPTABLE IN THE 80S – CALVIN HARRIS

Happy Birthday Phoenix!

On today’s show we heard about the couple just “ticketed” for parking on their own drive.

They’ve been parking there happily for the past 14 years but have now been issued with a parking ticket for parking “in a restricted area”. Not surprisingly they are set to challenge the penalty. It will be interesting to hear the outcome.

Today’s BYGONES feature took us back to the days when local dignitaries, many of the inhabitants and especially the local lads used to be involved in the annual traditional ceremony of BEATING THE BOUNDS which confirmed the boundary limits of the individual parishes.

Listen again here to what Margaret had to say on this subject: –

See you again next week,
Scott

I was delighted to welcome AIDAN SQUIRE, Chairman of the Essex Business Forum onto to today’s show.

Now it’s been a little while since I was engaged in the “hurly burly” of the business week so it was especially interesting for me to discover some of the new methods being used today to promote businesses, especially on the local front.

The Essex Business Forum has been running for the last 5 years and aims to promote and find new business opportunities for its members.

Listen here to what AIDAN told me about their activities: –

To find out more and see if the forum might be a suitable vehicle for your business just go to http://www.essexbusinessforum.com.

We also learnt about the woman accused of stealing a mobile phone she had just handed in to police.

See you try to do someone a good turn only to end up getting bitten on your rear end!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

The Village Green Festival in Southend is a brilliant mix of local and international talent, of literature, art and music, all presented in an urban park in Chalkwell. Joining me on the programme today were organisers Sean McLoughlan and Syd Moore.

Sean and Syd

You can listen to our chat here –

You can get a flavour of the festival by watching this video from last year

It all happens on 9th July 2016.

EARLY BIRD TICKETS (Available for a limited time only)
ADULT (over 18) £10
TEEN (11-17) £5
CHILD (10 & under) FREE

TO BOOK, CALL SKIDDLE ON 0844 884 2920 OR BOOK ONLINE at www.villagegreenfestival.com

Back at the end of January Dr Eric Watts joined me on the programme to talk about a new initiative – The Brentwood Cancer Support and Survivorship Group who were about to hold their 1^st meeting.

Dr Eric Watts

Dr Eric joined me again today to give us an update on developments and also to talk about the benefits of exercise to good health and the connection between lifestyle and illness. You can listen to our chat here –

To start another week we reported on the woman caught driving with a 15 foot tree impaled in the front of her car. Must have been on a “trunk” road, I guess.

Wonder what branch of car dealership sold her the vehicle.

Keeping – albeit loosely to cars and driving – we also heard about another woman who, two years after apparently undergoing a funeral and burial, following her “death” resulting from a serious car accident, miraculously reappeared on a TV show much to the astonishment of her husband.

Now that’s something that doesn’t happen every day!

As I’m away tomorrow, BOB SIMPSON will be looking after things for me so all being well, I’ll see you again next week.

Look after yourself til then,
Scott

On what was for me a bonus show this week, we heard all about the parking attendant who parked on a double yellow line whilst ticketing another illegally parked vehicle.

Clearly there’s one rule for some and another for the rest of us.

And in this case amazingly, that turns out to be true – traffic wardens are allowed to park their vehicles on double yellow lines whilst they are working.

Think I need to get one of their uniforms to keep in the car.

We also heard about the tenant, who after discovering that the landlord had sent his lease agreement on line, as a word document, as opposed to a “locked” pdf file, added a clause to require the landlord to supply his tenants with birthday cakes on their birthdays.

Now that is cheeky!

See you next week.
Scott

On this show last week, we heard about the man fined for emitting a loud belch in Vienna, but now closer to home comes news that residents and visitors to Salford could face on the spot fines for swearing.

Some have questioned whether the move breaches freedom of speech and the campaign group Liberty has asked what legal test will be applied to determine whether language is foul and/or abusive and to clarify the difference between language that is foul and language that is abusive. 

Oh how easy it is to potentially give lawyers another source of income!

Meanwhile over in the US comes news of a man who successfully killed himself whilst taking a “selfie” with a gun.

Strange that, most people I know, use a mobile phone!

But at least it was a good shot.

See you tomorrow,
Scott

Fresh from the latest monthly networking meeting of Brentwood Biscotti, Luke Adams popped in today to talk marketing.

Luke Adams

You can listen to our chat here –

It was great to welcome back some old chums! Still amazing audiences with their ukulele ensemble – it’s the finest ukulele band in the land, D’ukes.

David Warren, Brian Smith, John Mattock and Hazel Smith

Currently in the middle of their “Joy of Six” tour, we chatted about the band, what they have been up to, and hearing about their new CD that they are working on at the moment. Sadly Hazel had almost totally lost her voice today but we did hear a squeak or two from her!

You can listen here –

Yes the fully automated supermarket without any staff has arrived – well in Sweden at least.

Under the system you scan each purchase using your mobile phone so first off you have to register and download an app where you identify yourself using BankID, a Swedish ID solution used by banks over there.

That way you can be identified and will be allowed access only if you have no history of credit issues.

Ah but what happens if the systems gets a virus or suddenly goes haywire?

On that score we just don’t know, but I think I’d rather deal with real people.

This afternoon, Margaret Mills took us on a journey to Layer Marney Hall in Colchester.

Listen again to what Margaret said by clicking on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

Today we learnt about the fate suffered by bartender, EDIN MEHIC, when shortly after consuming a kebab, he inadvertently emitted a voluminous belch close to a police officer in Vienna’s Prater Fun Park.

He was promptly slapped with a £55 fine.

Reverberations of the belch are such that more than 100 people have since vowed to attend a loud belch-in at the site of the crime at the weekend.

Could be a bit of a blow for the authorities then!

Meanwhile from Wales comes news of the council who have arranged for a house to be purpose built for a 60-stone woman who can’t fit in her present home.

The new house has been thoughtfully located within half a mile of 13 takeaway restaurants including five Chinese takeaways, two Indians and a number of pizza and kebab shops so at least she shouldn’t go hungry!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

One of the rarer musicals is coming to town The Music Man will be at the Thameside Theatre very soon and Luke Coldham who plays the lead role Professor Harold Hill popped in to chat to Mike about the show.

You can hear the interview here

The Greek island of Lesvos is experiencing a humanitarian refugee crisis.

By this month, almost 14 million Syrians had fled their homes as a result of the Syrian Civil War. Close to 8 million are internally displaced within Syria, and over 6 million have sought refuge in neighbouring Turkey, Lebanon, Jordan, and Iraq. Hundreds of thousands have migrated onward into the Middle East, North Africa, and Europe, many of them via Lesvos. As of February 2016, the United Nations (UN) has identified 13.5 million Syrians requiring humanitarian assistance.
Sean Wright has been volunteering on Lesvos to help with the crisis there and I’m pleased to say that Sean joined me in the studio today to tell us about his experiences on the island in what turned out to be a fascinating and moving interview.

Sean Wright

You can listen to the interview here –

On today’s programme we reported the sad news of the demise of the man who launched over 333 million MOKA Coffee Makers onto world markets, only to end his days being interred in one!

In the second hour of the show, Margaret Mills popped by to explain how the celebrated composer Ralph Vaughan Williams, following a visit to Brentwood, was introduced to Essex folk music and set about securing it for posterity.

Listen again to what Margaret told me by clicking on the link below: –

See you next time,
Scott

Well I guess for the next 4 months we are going to be hearing more about the EU than you can shake a stick at. Today at least we reported on two European news items, neither of which is likely to affect your decision on how you will cast your vote in June.

First off came news of the Spanish building supervisor who had been happily drawing his salary without showing up for work for six years! His extended absence only came to light when he was due to receive a long service award. Instead this award was replaced by a $30,000 fine, which although still less than the salary he drew in just one year, he is petitioning to have set aside on the grounds that he was being bullied at work – well at least whilst he was there!

From the other side of the continent comes news of the fact that there is no love lost between the President and Prime Minister of the Czech Republic. During a radio interview, the President was asked how he might achieve the Prime Minister’s replacement to which he replied,   “The democratic option is one way, through free elections. The undemocratic option is to use a Kalashnikov.”

Perhaps old habits die hard in former Communist states!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

It was great to have the studio filled with young talented musicians today.

Ann Elderton and Sam Edwards with the Jazz Band

The Brentwood Orchestra for Young Musicians a group of eight orchestras of varying ages and abilities, linked by the love of music and how much they enjoy playing together. We spent almost an hour today listening to them perform and chatting about their organisation. Unfortunately the gremlins got involved in the first song they played and there is a little jump in the recording at that point but the rest is fine.

You can listen to the whole session here –

My thanks to Ann Elderton, Sam Edwards and band members Chris, Emma, Sebastian, Amy, Josiah, Jonny and Harry.

Brentwood Orchestras for Young Musicians website is here

Thanks also to our new volunteer Stacey who took these photos.

This afternoon we aired the second part of my interview with the Speaker of the House of Commons, the Right Honourable JOHN BERCOW MP. You can find out more on this and listen to the full interview here – http://www.phoenixfm.com/2016/02/15/order-order/.

In the second hour of the show I was pleased to be joined once more by Margaret Mills who’s subject today was H G Wells and the time he spent at Easton Lodge near Great Dunmow.

Listen again to what Margaret told me by clicking on the link below: –

Keep well until I see you once more next week,
Scott

In the first hour of today’s show we heard part one of my recent interview with the Speaker of the House of Commons, the Right Honourable JOHN BERCOW MP which is covered separately at http://www.phoenixfm.com/2016/02/15/order-order/.

Part 2 will air at around 1:15 tomorrow.

Later we heard all about the Dorset farmer selling containers of fresh air to the smog-plagued inhabitants of Beijing and Shanghai.

Trouble is of course that the breath of fresh air once released, is gone in an instant, but this doesn’t seem to deter purchasers who seem perfectly happy to shell out £80 a pop and view this as a luxury item fit only for those sitting at the top of the tree (where the air is probably cleaner anyway).

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Founded in 1962, Shenfield High School has a deep-rooted tradition of providing a rounded educational experience for students supported by a strong set of values. The school focuses on creating a supportive and happy environment.
Last year the school got 3 students into Oxford and 1 into Cambridge but the success doesn’t stop with the students,
Joining me today were two award winning teachers from Shenfield High School, Gill Power and Jonathon Sands.

Gill Power and Jonathon Sands

Gill will soon be awarded and Inspirational Teacher Award from Oxford University after being nominated by former pupil Jake Robinson.

Jonathon has successfully applied to become a Specialist Leader of Education.

You can listen to our chat here –

Today I featured two top tens – First was a list of the top 10 excuses for not getting a TV licence. Would you have “excused” them?
Check out the top 10 excuses for not getting a TV Licence.
1. “I don’t have to pay as I’m the King of Scotland.”
2. “I was abducted by aliens. As the Government don’t believe me, I’m refusing to pay my bills.”
3. “I have no television. It’s a microwave.”
4. “I only use the TV at night. I put the goldfish bowl in front of it at night. It helps the fish get to sleep.”
5. “The TV is only on for my parrot, Captain Jack Sparrow, who is learning the theme tune to Bargain Hunt.”
6. “I sent my man to the Co-op two months ago and he got done for shoplifting. I have not seen him since. He gets out next month, so I can pay it then.”
7. “I have a black-and-white licence. I only turn the colour on when my granddaughter comes and puts the music channels on.”
8. “Our pet turtle Betty turns 80 this December – do we get her free TV licence?”
9. “My cat is in labour, so I don’t have time to talk to you.”
10. “I don’t need a licence because I’m getting evicted for stabbing a guy in the head.”

With Valentine’s Day approaching, music licensing company PPL have compiled a chart of the most played love songs of the 21st century so far. Some of the entries may surprise you.

PPL Most Played Love Songs of the 21st Century:
1 Chasing Cars Snow Patrol
2 Rule The World Take That
3 Can’t Get You Out Of My Head Kylie Minogue
4 Crazy In Love Beyoncé Feat. Jay-Z
5 I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing Aerosmith
6 Livin’ On A Prayer Bon Jovi
7 I Wanna Dance With Somebody Whitney Houston
8 Bleeding Love Leona Lewis
9 Rather Be (Feat. Jess Glynne) Clean Bandit
10 Just The Way You Are Bruno Mars

Last Saturday our very own ANTONIA JONES related a story on her Breakfast Show that was just so good that I couldn’t resist giving it another airing today.

It seems that an Italian woman is facing up to 6 years in jail for failing to do the housework!

Yes it’s all true. Her husband reported her to the police of “bad management of domestic affairs”.

Amazingly the police agreed that there was a case to answer and referred the matter to judicial authorities who have decided to send the matter to trial in October under Article 572 of the Italian penal code which seeks to “punish whosoever mistreats a person in their family or a person entrusted to them for reasons of education, care or custody”.  

If found guilty the 42-year-old wife could face between two and six years in prison.

Someone who religiously does her housework is Margaret Mills and today she told us all about Samuel Courtauld who established his renowned textile business in Essex, and of his palatial home Gosfield Hall.

Listen again to what Margaret had to say today by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

I got to chat with JOHN DEBENHAM once more about the book that he and ANDREW SUMMERS co-wrote on the ESSEX HUNDRED HISTORIES.

The new edition of this book has just been published and now includes some extra items such as the legend of St George and the Dragon at Wormingford, the rector of Thurrock who, unknown to his parishioners had fought at the Battle of Waterloo, and the First World War aircraft station at Stow Maries, but it also includes items about what was supposed to be the most haunted house in England, Borley Rectory and, of course, the event, which nearly brought down a King – the Peasants Revolt of 1381.

Listen again to what John had to say on some of these subjects by clicking on the link below: –

Priced at £8:99 ESSEX HUNDRED HISTORIES is available from Waterstones and all other good book sellers or directly from the publishers at www.essex100.com

We also heard about the flight which had to be diverted due to a brawl which erupted on board. On this occasion however the fight was not between unruly passengers, but between members of the cabin crew! Looks as though the service on that flight might have been a little less friendly and courteous than advertised in the brochures.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Being a Tuesday I was pleased to welcome back Margaret Mills.

But first off we heard about the man who lives next to a beach in Somerset, who is not happy about the sand. So much so he has written to his local council to complain that they are not keeping it under control. Could be a tall order for them given the increasing frequency of high winds blowing the stuff around.

Back in Essex, Margaret Mills took us this week on a visit to the supposedly haunted village, and witch sanctuary of Canewdon. Listen again to what Margaret had to say today, by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

During our first outing in February, we heard all about the girl in Norway who believes she should have been born as a cat!

She may not have managed to catch a mouse yet but she purrs, meows, hisses at dogs, walks on all fours, wears a pair of cat ears and a tail, and likes to curl up in a sink and the windowsill.

What is unclear is how she washes herself – she doesn’t like water – and whether she goes outside to do her business or maybe she has a litter tray.

We also learnt about a police raid on an opera singer’s apartment after neighbours mistook his rehearsal for the scene of a violent incident of domestic violence.

How very embarrassing!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

The first meeting of the Brentwood Cancer Support and Survivorship Group is on Monday 1 February 2016 from 10 am until 12 pm in the Boardroom, 1st Floor, Brentwood Community Hospital. The aim is to meet others and share experience, and there will be support from St Luke’s Hospice.

Joining me today was Dr Eric Watts to tell us about the aims of the event and how he became involved in this project.

Dr Eric Watts

You can listen to our chat here –

If you would like to attend the meeting, simply turn up on Monday but if you would like to know more you can contact Dr Watts on  01277 211128 or email eric.watts4@btinternet.com

Have you ever wanted to control your dreams? Well today we heard about a product which claims to allow you to do just that. A bottle of 60 tablets will set you back about £21, but be warned reviews are mixed.

Coming back to reality, historical reality at any rate, Margaret Mills took us on a trip to Hadleigh Castle today and related tales of smuggling as well as ghostly goings and the connections with Henry VIII.

Listen again to all that Margaret said by clicking on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

Today we heard about two people who got themselves in a bit if a pickle.

First up came news of the pensioner who, because his bus to Edinburgh airport was being driven by a relief driver unfamiliar with the area, was dropped off in a remote location, forcing him to spend the first night of his holiday hunkered down in a recycling bin.

Next up we learnt about the Italian woman who had to get the fire brigade to release her from a chastity belt after she lost the keys.

How very embarrassing!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Joining me today was Luke Adams from Brentwood Biscotti.

Luke Adams

Luke told us all about Brentwood Biscotti and their next meet at The Marygreen Manor Hotel on 2nd February. You Can Listen to our chat here –

So Rocky and Mad Max and Star Wars are back on the big screen, Bowie’s at No.1 in the album charts, Grant Mitchell’s Back in Eastenders, The Spice Girls are re – uniting (without Posh), The BBC are bringing back Robot Wars. AM I in a time warp?

Well it was an excuse to play Damien and the Timewarp today anyway.

We also heard how the leader of the Conservative group on Thurrock Council has defended his decision to name his new born baby boy “Thatcher”

Thatcher Stephen Maguire,  was born on 8 January. Proud father Rob Gledhill said he was “happy” with the name.

“It’s a parent’s decision to call their child what they like… if he’s not happy with it when he’s older I’m sure he’ll change it”.

Well Rob, I don’t think it would have been any worse if you had called him Margaret! I’m sure he will change his name one day.

Yes the start of yet another week but hopefully we were able to brighten up your day a bit with a couple of oddball stories.

First off we heard about the felon who was so vain that, taking offence at the police mugshots of him, he sent them a rather more flattering picture.

Although claiming that the new picture was a better likeness, it still took another 24 hours before police finally caught up with him.

Next up came news of the German based Meals on Wheels charity, who following a mix up, provided pensioners with dog food instead of the game feast they had been promised to celebrate the New Year.

Must have been a mistake that was hard to swallow!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Having bravely soldiered on to present One 2 Three with Man-Flu today I thought it would be a good idea to share some tips on how to deal with this potentially serious condition.

Advice for men suffering with Man Flu

It’s imperative that you get to your place of safety before the full force of Man Flu takes hold. Phone your nominated female carer (normally wife or girlfriend) and inform her of the crisis which is about to unfold. They must reach you at your place of safety in the initial stages before you become bed ridden.

Once you’re home it’s important that you feel as comfortable as possible. Slip into your dressing gown, pop your feet up on the sofa and reach for the remote control.

Your nominated female carer will feel helpless as you plunge deeper and deeper into misery. Counter her feeling of helplessness by keeping her occupied with small tasks, such as massaging your feet or using a sponge to lightly dampen your forehead.

Allow her to prepare Man Flu comfort foods such as chicken noodle soup, or put Man Flu comfort television on, such as Police! Camera! Action!, or All The Goals of the World Cup 2006. Keep her fit and healthy by regularly sending her to the shops for a selection of men’s magazines for you to browse. Remember, you’re doing this for her.

it is imperative that a period of convalescence is taken. All to often men try to soldier on through the last symptoms only to be flung back into the depths of the illness because they didn’t rest for the full term of the condition. Begin by moving short distances away from the sofa. Try not to mention your near death experience.

Frequently, following a period of Man Flu, the nominated female carer may also start to exhibit symptoms such as a runny nose and aching joints. This is, of course, the common cold and not Man Flu (obviously!). By far, the best way for her to deal with this is carry on with her normal day to day routine as if the cold wasn’t there. After all, it’s hardly Man Flu, is it?

And ladies remember…

Men do not ‘moan’ when they have Man-Flu. They emit involuntary groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain they are in.

Full recovery from Man-Flu will take place much quicker if their simple requests for care, sympathy and regular cups of tea are met. Is that really so much to ask? Florence Nightingale would have done it

Men suffering from Man-Flu want nothing more than to get out of bed and come to work, but they are too selfless to risk spreading this awful condition amongst their friends and colleagues. In this sense, they are the greatest heroes this country has ever known.
I’m so grateful to manflu.info for this advice. Visit the website for more sensible advice and tips.

I started today’s show by playing David Bowie and Lazurus from his final album Blackstar.

I first heard some of Blackstar last week. On hearing a few minutes of the title track I dismissed it as miserable and self indulgent and didn’t bother to listen to the rest of the album.
Like most of us though I was very sad to hear of his death on Monday and knowing that he had produced this album under a death sentence of cancer I revisited the album. I found this a very humbling experience.
In the track Lazurus, Bowie appears to have written his own epitaph. Further than that though he has taken the occasion of his own death and turned it into a work of art.
The videos which accompany Blackstar and Lazurus are deep and disturbing and remind us all of our own mortality.
Art is supposed to touch us on an emotional level. Great art can touch us deeply and change our thinking and our lives.
In his final goodbye to us David Bowie has produced one of his finest pieces of art ever.

Yes believe it or not a retired CIA operative has come up with the idea that far from committing suicide at the end of the war, Hitler may well have escaped to the Canary Islands before being ferried to Argentina by submarine.

I have to say this report got me wondering about the stroppy bloke I saw last time I was there, stamping on people’s sand castles.

Admittedly he wasn’t wearing that  trademark moustache but I was a little surprised by the swastica on his swimming trunks!

This afternoon Margaret Mills took us on a tour of Paycock House in Coggeshall. If you missed what she said just click on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

On today’s show we learnt about the man who has a total freak out whenever he sees himself in the mirror.

Well he’s actually a clown but the problem is that he suffers from the condition known as  “coulrophobia” which is a fear of clowns so if he sees himself wearing the make up he promptly needs a tranquilliser!

Now cast your mind back to the turn of the century. Do you remember all the concerns about the so-called millennium bug?

Well it seems as though we might have had a lucky escape since Facebook, which uses software based on the UNIX code has just hit trouble.

It seems that the date December 31st 1969 has special significance to this computer software with the result that people have been receiving messages congratulating them for being friends on the site for 46 years even though Facebook didn’t come into existence until 2004.

Well I never!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

What a great couple of guys! It’s two years since I last spoke to Richie and Bill on air. They came into studio one today, created a great party atmosphere and performed four great songs for us.

Richie Milton and Bill Farrow

Richie and Bill are currently performing as “Bill’nRicky” performing a mix of songs, old and new as a cockney duo in a Singalong/Rockney/Skiffle style. You can find their website here including the video for “Pulling All The Boozers Down” in which I swear they have Tony Blair playing the double bass! What do you think?

You can listen to this afternoon’s session including four great songs here –

Take a look at a very young Bill Farrow performing with Mable Hillery on BBC 2’s Late Night Line Up with Joan Bakewell in 1967 –

Thanks to Bill’nRicky today. Come back soon guys!

http://www.richiemilton.co.uk/

With a new year comes the annual supply of new calendars – some more exciting and colourful than others!

And lovers of roundabouts – we’re talking traffic control features here – have not been left out, as once again founder of the Roundabout Appreciation Society, Kevin Beresford has been poring over pictures of roundabouts from all over the world, to whittle them down to just 12 of the best.

This year’s edition is guaranteed not to disappoint aficionados as it includes pictures of quaint English village roundabouts featuring duck ponds to huge 40ft-high so-called ‘Gyratory Galacticos’ of Mexico City and America and priced at just £9:99 it’s sure to be a big hit. 

Now being a Tuesday, Margaret Mills joined us with reports of spooky goings on at Beeleigh Abbey in Maldon.

Listen again to what Margaret had to say on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Well at least as far as we are concerned we are already in 2016, but if you were one of the 30 inhabitants of the island of Foula in the Shetlands, it’s not even Christmas yet.

As they still use the old Julian calendar they mark Christmas week between the 6 and 13th January. I used to find it tricky dealing with my colleagues on the continent with a time difference of just one hour, so how these people manage their dealings with the mainland with a difference of nearly a fortnight, must be quite something!

Well we might now be getting over Christmas, but it seems that the supermarkets are now busily trying to get us fixated on Easter as it seems they are already stocking their shelves with Easter eggs.  

Perhaps this why if you go to try and buy a winter coat in the Autumn you find that they’ve already sold out and are onto their spring season. Maybe they’ll soon get so far ahead that they’ll be stocking next year’s stock in the right season!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Tributes have been pouring in for Motorhead frontman Lemmy who has died aged 70, two days after learning he had cancer.

His local bar ran out of his favourite tipple Jack Daniels as fans queued around the block to get in to pay tribute. I resisted the temptation to get the JD out myself but we did celebrate his life with an ace of spades today

It’s Jeff Lynne’s 67th birthday today – What better excuse to listen to a couple of ELO tracks today.

And with Beatles songs being streamed an astonishing 50 million times in the first 48 hours after they became available to listen to live on the internet for the first time, I wondered if we might see some of their songs enter the UK top 40 this week now that streaming is included in compiling the chart.

The most popular Beatles song so far is Come Together, which has already been streamed more than 1.8 million times.

We’ll find out on New Years Day.

It emerged last week that a cafe in Italy has unknowingly been serving customers with cups of tea with a little extra ingredient – cocaine.

The issue came to light only after a 38-year old bus driver, who’s been imbibing a cuppa every morning, to give himself a “lift”, tested positive for the drug.

After police confirmed that boxes of delisse alla coca tea contained the drug, the beverage was immediately ordered to be withdrawn from sale. Wonder what he’ll use now for his daily “pick-me-up”!

Margaret Mills abandoned her Christmas celebrations to pop by and tell us about William Pynchon who whilst born and bred in Writtle, became one of the Founding Fathers of an area in Massachusetts.

Unfortunately a book he wrote on religion went down like the proverbial lead balloon with the Puritans and he was forced to return to Essex.

Listen again to what Margaret had to tell me on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

See you next week,
Scott

Now I don’t know about you, but for me the magic has rather gone out of Christmas and I’m quite glad when the whole thing is over and done with, but believe it or not a Wiltshire man is so hooked on Christmas that he’s been celebrating it EVERY DAY for the last 22 years.

Every day he stuffs himself  with 25 mince pies and a full turkey, watches recordings of Top of the Pops Christmas specials  and especially the Queen’s Speech which he sets to run precisely at 3pm every afternoon. He then opens prezzies he’s sent himself after pulling crackers – 40 of them!

Over the years the habit has cost him a cool £2m with £500 alone spent on Christmas decorations and as for presents, well he’s lashed out on designer shirts, flashy guitars, even a penny farthing. His most extravagant purchase was a £26,000 Mercedes 350 bearing the number plate MR XMAS.

But with money running short and his health affected by all that gorging he says that he’s going to kick the habit this Boxing Day.

Whilst this guy is busy trying to re-live his own version of Groundhog Day, another worthy from Nashville thought he could use his car to enter a “time portal” but succeeded only in demolishing a tax office and a coffin makers business. He was lucky not to end up in one, methinks.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

So Christmas is here at last! From us all here on Phoenix FM, may we wish you a very Merry Christmas. In this special show for Christmas Bob Simpson caught up with some of the good people of Brentwood and Billericay, including some names you may recognise, and asked them what their favourite Christmas song or carol was.

Noelle Hones (Deputy Mayor) and Mark Reed (Mayor of Brentwood)

The result is a two hour collection of some of the best Christmas tunes you will hear anywhere. You can Listen here. Enjoy!

Alan Woods from The Brentwood Gazette

Brentwood Street Pastors

Robert Gunn from Brentwood Brewing Company

All of the above chose their favourites, and one of them is responsible for bringing Max Bygraves back on the airwaves! And why not? He sings a jolly tune! You’ll have to listen to find out who requested him.

As a lifelong Beatles fan Christmas came early for me today. It was a huge pleasure to be joined in the studio by members of a Beatles tribute band with a difference – The Solo Beatles.

Simon Cantwell, Simon Sheehan and Paul Nooney of The Solo Beatles

You can listen to the entire session here –

You can find out more about the band on their website here

Or connect with them on Facebook here

Me resplendent in my Beatle shirt trying to get in on the act!

The Solo Beatles will be appearing at The Essex Arms next year on February 27th. I will be there!

My special thanks to all the members of the band for the great deal of work they did to make this afternoon’s session such a pleasure.

Being my final show before Christmas I thought it might be interesting to report on the findings of a survey which suggest that astonishingly more than half of mothers-in-law in the UK will not only not receive a gift from their son or daughter’s partner, but will actually be lucky to get so much as a season’s greeting!

Of those that do get something, they will apparently be lucky if the gift costs more than £20 whilst over £200 is lavished on gifts for children.

Oh and just in case you wanted to know the average spend for a partner is £163 with men apparently more generous than women although men take a minor role when helping to buy for everyone else.

For her eve of Christmas offering, Margaret Mills looked back at the life of an architect and builder, who although born and bred in Leicester, is credited for the design and building of many stately homes, and notably Shire Hall here in Essex.

If you missed today’s feature, just click on the link below to hear it again: –

I hope you have an absolutely marvellous Christmas and I look forward to seeing you again next week,
Scott

We learnt today that in a poll conducted last week, no less than 30% of people claiming to be Republican voters, said they were in favour of bombing the Middle Eastern town of Agrabah. The only problem here is that Agrabah is the fictional town in Disney’s Aladdin.

Frighteningly these very people will be going to the polls before too long to chose the next leader of the western world!

Also from the USA comes news of the lady real estate agent duped into promoting a spoof product, called the “Pet Euthanasia Glove”, supposedly being marketed by SUPER AMAZING INNOVATIONS. The product as described, would supposedly allow pet owners to save on vet’s bills when the time came for their animals to enter “THE HAPPY HUNTING GROUND”.

All the owner would have to do was to dip their gloved hand into toxic powder and literally pet their dog to sleep.

What will they think of next?

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Today’s show carried a Government health warning!
A smog alert has been issued by DEFRA (The Department for Food Agriculture and Rural Affairs) citing that a toxic fog and a cloud of dust was about to engulf parts of Britain including Essex today.

Health experts were warning people with asthma and other conditions to stay indoors and avoid exercise so I thought it would be a good idea to include the warning on the show today.

However it doesn’t seem to have happened. At least I wasn’t aware of any smog today. Were you?

Looking forward to next Wednesday’s show when as a Christmas treat my guests will be The Solo Beatles.

Playing the hits that John, Paul, George and Ringo released after they decided to Let it be, they are focused entirely on the music, and not distracted by trying to do pale imitations of scouse accents or dressing up in period costumes.

The huge wealth of material that the “Post Fab Four” produced after they parted company provides them with the material for an entertaining evening of familiar songs that are innovative, entertaining and exciting.

they include songs by Wings, The Plastic Ono Band and also The Traveling Wilburys plus one or two “Beatles” Songs

They pride themselves on rich vocal harmonies and respectful arrangements mixed with an energy and excitement these great songs deserve

Tune in from 1pm next Wednesday to hear them live on the programme.

The Solo Beatles

I never ceased to be amazed by the human condition and today proved no exception as we learnt about the father of 7, who after 23 years of marriage has decided to abandon his family and live life as a 6-year old girl!

The newly adopted family are seemingly comfortable with her living with them as a little girl, and now relieved of adult responsibilities, she spends her days happily playing with toys and colouring books.

She originally planned to live as an 8-year old but changed to being 6 so as to be the youngest!

So what does she want for Christmas, I wonder.

Coming back to reality, Margaret Mills looked back at the Essex connections with the First World War nurse, Edith Cavell who was, of course, charged with treason and executed by the Germans for aiding the escape of allied servicemen from German occupied Belgium.

Listen again to what Margaret told me by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Unfortunately these days we do have to be ultra vigilant when we are out and about, especially in crowded areas, but you have to be somewhat sympathetic for the guy who found himself forcibly restrained by armed police following a tip off that he was acting suspiciously and apparently armed with a handgun.

The “handgun” turned out to be nothing more lethal than a cheese sandwich, which I suppose is likely to be fairly harmless unless it was well “out of date”!

We also heard about the Suffolk man who loves tractors. And when I say he loves tractors I mean,  he REALLY loves tractors.

It seems that he has had “one way” affairs with no less than 450 of them. After police caught him in flagrante delicto with a tractor in a field outside Saxmundham, they raided his house to find a collection of more than 5,000 tractor images on his laptop which showed that he had a special attraction for John Deere and Massey Ferguson tractors, particularly green ones.

As a result of his exploits he has been banned from venturing within a mile of a farm and must now stay in the centre of Ipswich.

This restriction has  caused some police officers to express concern for the safety and wellbeing of several street cleaning machines in the town.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Taking a Break from 54 years on the road the fabulous Frank Allen called Mike to chat about past times and the upcoming gig at the Queens Theatre Hornchurch

You Can hear the interview again here

It was great to chat to Paul Metcalfe today. Tomorrow evening he performs a special concert for Saint Francis Hospice.

Paul as Rod Stewart

Paul’s performances as Rod Stewart are stunningly accurate. He looks the same, his mannerisms are the same and the voice is pure Rod. You can listen to our chat here –

You can find out more about Paul here

Full details of tomorrow night’s concert in aid of St Francis Hospice

If you’ve been glued to the goggle box recently watching the antics of a load of celebrities enjoying life in the jungle, maybe you’ve wondered just what some of the snacks they are required to imbibe, taste like. Well if so wonder no more as the Edible Insect Company, Grub has announced that it has secured its first listing for the Roasted Cricket snack range with the Whole Foods Markets chain.

Since launching the business two years ago they have been developing their range of innovative snacks which includes roasted crickets and cricket nut fudge, and they anticipate that their eagerly awaited insect cook book will be published in April, with the country’s first cricket-for-food farm for human consumption planned for an early 2016 launch.

Can’t wait!

Now believe it or not but Hockley was once a spa town rivalling the attractions of Bath and Royal Tunbridge Wells and this afternoon Margaret Mills took us back to those heady days.

To listen again to what she had to say on this subject, just click on the link below:-

See you again next week,
Scott

Last week our very own Chris Hood caught up with ANDREW THORPE-APPS, chair of AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL’s CHELMSFORD branch who explained what the organisation is and does and also told us a little bit about their WRITE for RIGHTS event happening at 8pm in Chelmsford tomorrow evening.

Listen again to what Andrew told Chris by clicking on the link below: –

Meanwhile we also heard some of the thought provoking questions posed by pupils at Billericay’s QUILTER JUNIOR SCHOOL to their local MP, JOHN BARON  about last week’s decision to extend UK military action against IS in Syria.

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Crikey – December already! Christmas is just over 3 weeks away when we’ll all be tucking into roast turkey with all the trimmings.

Now hopefully everyone knows just what a turkey is but believe it or not a survey has just revealed that a fifth of young adults think that fish fingers are actually made from the fingers of fish.

Amazingly 15% don’t realise that lamb comes from sheep or that a pig is the source of a pork chop. On top of that 9% think that potatoes grow on trees; hate to be underneath if a spud falls off!

After examining the somewhat dubious activities of the Witchfinder General last week, this week Margaret Mills focused her attention on the Brentwood martyr, William Hunter and the appalling way in which he was executed in Brentwood, just for standing up for his beliefs. Thank goodness we live in rather more enlightened times.

Listen again to what Margaret said on this subject today by clicking on the link below:-

See you again next week,
Scott

After Lighting up Brentwood on Saturday, we are now clearly entering into the Christmas season of markets and Dickensian Fairs and whilst Brentwood’s lighting up event went smoothly, up in Cumbria, Ulverstone’s annual Dickensian Christmas Festival raised more than a few eyebrows following a potentially dodgy marketing gaffe.

In an effort to bring the Dickensian event into the 21st century, the organisers decided to add to their promotional effort by using on line marketing.

Unfortunately their Twitter account used the less than child friendly, hashtag of #dickfest.

Committee member and marketing boss for the event, Grant Huck, told Cumbria Live: “It’s an abbreviation! Short, sharp and memorable. It seems that Twitter users appreciate a more light-hearted approach to PR so I just thought it would get folk talking. It’s certainly worked. To be honest, I don’t know many people who don’t shorten it to Dick Fest in conversation anyway, so it was the logical choice,” he said.

One comment suggested that a “Social Media for Beginners course” might be advisable.

Now I guess that when we were at school, we might sometimes have been fearful of parent’s reaction to a bad report.

Well it seems that one enterprising youngster came up with an idea to divert attention elsewhere.

He wrote a letter to his dad saying that he had eloped with his pregnant girl friend to live in a trailer, grow and sell marijuana to other members of the commune.

He then added a PS which made it clear that what he’d written was in fact total nonsense intended to remind them that there are many things in life worse than the school report waiting on the kitchen table, and asking them to call him when it was safe to come home.

Full marks for that I’d say!

See you next time,
Scott

Today we heard about two very different people who seem to have taken the law into their own hands but with very contrasting results!

First off came news of the man who went to Canterbury Court to testify on behalf of his pal only to end up being jailed himself. In an effort to convince his wife that he was in court he inadvisedly took a photo of his friend in the dock as well as a “selfie”. Taking photographs in court is, of course, highly illegal and he ended up paying the penalty.

In the second hour of the show, Margaret Mills took us back to the time of the English Civil War when for 3 years between 1644 and 1647, MATTHEW HOPKINS, who proclaimed himself WITCHFINDER GENERAL, stalked areas of ESSEX, SUFFOLK and NORFOLK, and together with his associates was responsible for more hangings of people accused of witchcraft than in the previous 100 years.

Listen again to what Margaret had to say on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next time,
Scott

We heard today about the over amorous dog who got its head stuck in a cat flap in its efforts to reach a mate in the garden. In the end the cat flap came away from the door allowing the would-be Romeo entry to the house. Only time will tell whether or not the mood was broken by her head being wedged in the cat flap!

As we know Paris is often considered to be the city of romance, but if you ever intended to fly to Paris Orly airport, you might want to put your trip on hold after it was revealed that air traffic control computers at that airport run on Windows 3.1 which went out of date about 20 years ago and is probably barely capable of running a cash machine, let alone an air traffic control system. Apparently the French Transportation Ministry has vowed to upgrade the system by 2017. Perhaps they’ll get Windows 95!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Returning refreshed from a week in the sunshine, mercifully without any emergency landings, we heard today about one flight forced into an emergency landing, not due to technical faults or anything so potentially catastrophic, but due to excessive flatulence on the part of the passengers. In this case however the passengers were goats – 2600 of ’em! It seems that sensors mistook the gaseous emissions from the goats as smoke, triggering alarms in the cockpit. Maybe an idea to be careful what you eat before your next flight.

A couple of weeks ago, Margaret Mills told us about some riotous behaviour in the STEEPLE BUMPSTEAD of the 1860’s and today Margaret provided us with a follow-up story. Listen again to what Margaret reported today by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

On my bonus show today we tried to peer ahead into the future.

First off we examined one prediction of a new style fortune teller who employs her fortune telling skills by examining images of used wax strips after people have had their legs waxed. So if you feel like tearing her off a strip you now know what to do.

Secondly we wondered what the high street of tomorrow might look like if the current experiment being conducted in Liverpool, of having fast and crawler lanes for pedestrians goes national. They already have them in such diverse place as China and Belgium, so why not here as well? It seems that research has shown that 31% of people are frustrated by “pavement hoggers” and 27% annoyed by slow pedestrians checking phones etc. We shall see!

Right I’m off now. See you next on Tuesday week, thats the 17th November.
Scott

If you’ve been perusing the popular press of late you will probably have seen that the world was supposed to end firstly on the 28th September, and then when that didn’t happen, the 7th October.

But surprise, surprise, we’re all still here so I guess no one should be astonished to learn that whilst no new date has actually been definitively confirmed, we are now advised that it will happen before the end of the year.

According to theorists, a full sized planet, known as NIBURU will collide with the Earth before December, destroying life forever! But before you go out and splurge every last atom of your savings it might be worth wondering quite why with all the probes we’ve sent into space, the Hubble Telescope etc, no one seems to have spotted this rogue planet – unless, of course, it’s all a huge NASA cover up.

The subject of today’s contribution from Margaret Mills, concerned a riot back in 1861 by the lads of the village of Steeple Bumpstead – over football. What else? Listen again to what Margaret had to say on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

We’re not here next week so our next Bygones feature will be in two weeks time on November 17th.

See you then,
Scott

I was delighted once more to be joined by Lord Petre from Ingatestone Hall who regaled us today with news of another of his colourful ancestors. His chosen subject today was the 11th Lord Petre  – WILLIAM HENRY FRANCES – who lived between 1793 and 1850. During the course of his years he became the first Lord Petre who was able to take his seat in the House of Lords but before that, whilst not himself on the battlefield at the Battle of Waterloo, his cousin reportedly managed to capture Napoleon’s favourite horse MARENGO.

Listen again to all that Lord Petre had to tell me by clicking on the link below: –

Later in the show we heard all about the restaurant voted to the top position, not only in Cardiff, but also in the whole of Wales. On top of that the restaurant is also in the UK top 10 places to eat. OK so nothing particularly unusual about that you may say – but this restaurant has more bars than most and not just bars you can order from – as this restaurant is inside Cardiff prison and run by the inmates. In spite of this they have beaten establishments run by celebrity chefs like Gordon Ramsay and Jamie Oliver. Customers are full of praise for the  “friendly and informative staff” who put other waiters to shame.

If you are thinking of going there, my only advice would be not to try and leave without paying otherwise you could be doing the washing up for a very long stretch!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

A bonus show for me today as I was sitting in for the holidaying, MIKE JONES.

With Halloween almost upon us we took a look at two related stories. From the USA comes news of a HAUNTED HOUSE attraction (if that’s the right word) said to be so terrifying that you have to sign a disclaimer before you go in. Consisting of 17 interactive rooms, it takes around half an hour from start to finish. Called the 17th Door it apparently  tells the story of Paula, a student who has just moved to university to pursue her dream of becoming a doctor.

A description on the website reads: “If you think you are prepared to enter Paula’s world, then know this: everything inside this realm, which assaults your senses, is real.

“The question is: can you make it? Can you walk in Paula’s shoes through the dissolution of her life to withstand what’s behind that final door?

“Or will you want to escape along with her…perhaps even before her? Can you survive this, or will you scream MERCY in order to be escorted out of this nightmare? Are you brave enough to make it through…The 17th Door?”

Sounds like a pleasant way to spend an afternoon!

Closer to home an Amsterdam nightclub is planning to hold a BLOOD RAVE tomorrow night, which reportedly involves spraying revellers with no less than 5000 litres of real blood. Organisers have described the event as “pushing the boundaries but we want to see how far we can go!”

Not an event to wear your best outfit to then!

See you next week,
Scott

Two great anniversaries this week – 50 years since the release of The Who‘s My Generation and 40 years since the release of Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody. We heard them both on the show today along with lots of new music too with the new Phoenix FM A List just released.

Being a bit of an oldie myself I don’t actually remember much about The Who of the sixties, I was very much a fan in the seventies and beyond though.

What was far more shocking was to realise that in a few days time it will be 40 years since Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody was released. I remember that clearly and the video that went along with it that seemed to be shown on Top of the Pops for weeks and weeks. The success of the song was in part due to one of my heroes, Kenny Everett who went on a personal crusade, playing the song on his show over and over after Queen’s record company executives said that a six minute song would never get played on the radio! The rest is history…

Well that’s it, 40 years ago and still fresh in my mind. I’m now officially old!

If you are a criminal on the run, it’s usually a good idea to keep a low profile but we heard today about one such individual who took the unorthodox approach of posting a video on line which helpfully included the location of where it had been made. When arrested our hero thought someone had shopped him and refused to believe that the video had anything to do with it! As I say there’s one born every minute.

On this week’s BYGONES feature, Margaret Mills took us back to July 1615 when it seems a well heeled inhabitant of Hatfield Broadoak  – Lady Joan Barrington – obtained medical advice from her doctor – by post! How the doctor, based in Colchester, was able to diagnose her ailment without seeing her is astonishing but clearly the recommended cure did her no harm as she lived for another 26 years to the ripe old age of 83.

Listen again to what Margaret said by clicking on the link below: –

See you again soon,
Scott

Do you remember the days when you used to be hanging by an arm each between Mum and Dad kicking the autumn leaves around? Well as some parts of the USA don’t experience the autumn leaves as such, we heard today about the enterprising man who delivers autumn to people living in those areas. Yes for about £13 he will box up and despatch a load of New England fallen leaves. Amazingly he has already hit over 200 sales to date. And after autumn comes winter and last year he supplied clients across the States with around 720 lbs. of snow. I wonder if he’ll keep this year’s prices frozen.

Keeping to the theme of childhood, I guess many of us have memories of either being taken to, or taking our own children or grandchildren, to soft play areas in shopping centres, theme parks or stand-alone outlets. All good clean, safe fun. Well it is safe so long as the parents keep order – their own that is, not the kids. Unfortunately during a children’s party being held at one such emporium in Russia things went terribly wrong when an argument broke out between parents over disciplining a child. It seems that things started innocently enough when one of the mothers complained to another about her child’s behaviour.

From this point events took on a momentum of their own and before long a major brawl erupted between the mothers with the women throwing violent punches, kicks and pulling each other’s hair whilst their kids looked on horrified. Eventually security guards were forced to intervene and brought the birthday party to a tumultuous conclusion. By the time police arrived most of the mums had grabbed their kids and fled.

Well that’s a great example, I must say!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

A busy week for me on Phoenix this week. It actually started on Tuesday when I joined Scott W in studio 2 to record this month’s Mental Health Matters on Phoenix FM Podcast – a music special this month.

Bob and Scott – We so enjoyed putting together the great music for this podcast!

You can listen to it here or if you prefer on Saturday night (24th) when it will be broadcast at 8pm on Phoenix FM.

The rest of the week was taken up with my usual shows on Wednesday and Thursday plus a bonus show today sitting in for Mike Jones.

A couple of brand new tracks I enjoyed this week were the new one from Duran Duran featuring Nile Rodgers –

And Elton John’s new single from his 33rd studio album, ‘Wonderful Crazy Night,’ which will be out worldwide on February 5, 2016 on Virgin EMI Records.

Have a great weekend!

How would you feel if when you took your date to a restaurant, she tucked into a plate full of washing-up sponges whilst you were enjoying a nice juicy rump steak? Well believe it or not, that would be the choice of dish every time for 23-year old Tyneside resident, EMMA THOMPSON. Not sure if she’d like a side order of chips to go with the sponges though, so it might be wise to factor in that cost, before going too wild with your own order. Emma has enjoyed eating bath sponges since the age of 3 but became addicted to washing-up sponges after scoffing one whilst doing the washing up 2 years ago.

It seems she especially enjoys them if they’ve been soaked overnight in apple flavoured Fairy Liquid!

Of course, being a Tuesday, Margaret Mills popped by. Her subject this week was the Essex earthquake of April 1884 which, in spite of lasting no more than 8 seconds wreaked extensive damage to the areas surrounding Colchester.

Listen again to what Margaret said on this subject by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Can you imagine innocently buying some Christmas Crackers in a major department store and then being challenged as to what you were going to use the gunpowder for? Well that’s tantamount to what happened to East Sussex based great grandparents, Bert and Ivy Francis who were asked to provide their full names and address for “security reasons”.

Meanwhile over in Sweden members of a beard club being surrounded by police after a member of the public mistook them for terrorists!

Glad I had a shave this morning!

See you again tomorrow.
Scott

Editor in chief of the Enquirer group of newspapers Neil Speight visited the programme today and enjoyed a long chat with Mike.

Neil has been involved in the newspaper business for a very long time and discussed his background and the future of the local and national press

You can here the interview again here

It was a huge pleasure to meet and chat to Jeff Brown on the show today.

Jeff Brown

Jeff has played with some of the biggest names in rock. For 16 years Jeff performed with Sweet and then was snapped up by iconic 60’s band The Tremeloes. He has recently been working on a solo album “23 Years” due to be released next month and today we heard three tracks from the album and talked about his career. You can listen to the interview and snippets of those tracks here but to hear them in full you’ll have to buy the album 23 Years!

You can find out more about Jeff Brown and his various projects here

My second guest today was Jo Rayment from a wonderful organisation – Frontline Partnership.

Jo Rayment

Frontline Partnership enables and supports people with a learning disability and high support needs to live full and productive lives through their active inclusion, participation and contribution within the Brentwood community and farther afield. You can listen to our chat here – 

If you would like to get involved with Frontline Partnership as a volunteer you can call 01277 233889

Or why not nip along to their quiz on 30th November to support a great organisation –

Date:	Friday 30 October 2015
Time:	19:00 – 22:00
Event:	Fundraising Quiz
Organised by:	Frontline Partnership
Location:	Brentwood School Sports Centre (Courage Hall), Middleton Hall Lane, Brentwood CM15 8EE map
Details:	A fun evening for all. Come along and test your brains at our light hearted quiz evening and help to raise valuable funds for Frontline Partnership, a local charity that supports adults with a learning disability to live a full and active life within the Brentwood Community. There will be a delicious buffet and drinks can be purchased at the licensed bar.
Cost:	£10.00
Contact:	Frontline Partnership 01277 233889 Website

Ukulele band D’Ukes – The finest ukulele band in the universe! – were my first guests today. They’ve had a very busy year so far and are coming to Brentwood on 14th November.

Brian, John, Hazel and Dave from D’Ukes

We chatted about what they’ve been up to lately, heard some of their music, and heard about future plans. You can listen to our chat here –

You can find out more about D’Ukes here – Website Facebook

We discovered today that believe it or not, it is now illegal to cut a wedding cake in the Russian Republic of Chechnya. Not only that but the bride is not allowed to dance at all and other guests, “tripping the light fantastic”, will have to do so at arms length! What’s worse your party could even be gatecrashed by government minders, just to make sure that the new regulations are being fully adhered to.

There’s now talk of extending the rules to cover other celebrations such as birthdays and anniversaries. Sounds like fun!

And also taking a black view on things, Margaret Mills’ subject today was about how the arrival of the Black Death took its toll on the inhabitants of Colchester. Listen again to what Margaret said by clicking on the link below: –

See you again next week,
Scott

Today we heard all about the duck who is quite partial, to a refreshing drop of beer. Unfortunately after perhaps indulging rather more enthusiastically than usual, became involved in a pub brawl with a dog. It seems that the duck is not only a regular drinker at THE OLD COURTHOUSE INN, down in Chudleigh, Devon, but together with his owner, Barrie Hayman, performs on stage for charity. On this occasion there could be only one winner – the dog! However the duck named, STAR, is expected to make a full recovery and will soon be back strutting his stuff in front of a delighted audience.

From the other side of the Atlantic comes news of an Orlando based attorney and would-be Senator, who has come to prominence after admitting that he sacrificed a goat and drank its blood. He is standing for election on a platform which includes promises to start a second civil war and a eugenics programme which would sterilise, euthanise or forcibly abort ‘the weakest, least intelligent, and most diseased citizens. Looks like a winning formula to me!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

New for 2016 is Shenfield High School’s Performing Arts Academy.

To tell us all about it Head of Drama Kim Bradley came into the studio along with two pupils, Jade Evans and Alfie Gardener.

Alfie, Kim and Jade

You can listen to our chat, along with a song from Daynah Lorelle and Liam Bull (also Shenfield High School Students) here

The Guide Dogs for the Blind Association nowadays known as Guide Dogs is a British charity founded in 1934.

Guide Dogs provides help to thousands of blind and partially sighted people across the UK through the provision of guide dogs, mobility and other rehabilitation services. They also campaign for the rights of those with visual impairments and invest in eye disease research.

On Thursday in Shenfield there’s a fundraising event for Guide dogs, and joining me today to talk about it was Brenda Weaver.

You can listen to our chat here – 

Date:	Thursday 8 October 2015
Time:	10:30 – 13:00
Event:	Coffee Morning in aid of The Guide Dogs
Organised by:	Guide Dogs
Location:	Mount Avenue Banqueting Suite, Mount Avenue, Shenfield CM13 2NS map
Details:	As well as the coffee there will be a raffle, Christmas cards, homemade jams and crafts and a chance to meet some puppies and adult guide dogs!
Cost:	Free
Contact:	Brenda Weaver 07753 482351

During today’s show I received an email from one of my previous guests – Tracey Cowling from HBBS

Tracey Cowling

Tracey was asking us to spread the word about their new Snowdrop group starting next week. I thought I would surprise Tracey with a phone call! As you will hear, Tracey rose to the challenge magnificently! You can listen here –

We heard today about the Welsh lady who, due to administrative failures and red tape, for the past 3 years, has had to suffer having treatment for each of her knees in two different hospitals – 54 miles apart. Her left knee is treated by doctors in Llandough, near Cardiff but for treatment to her right knee she has to go to Llanelli. To make matters worse it has seemingly proved incredibly difficult to fix appointments, as they keep getting lost in the system, with extra frustration resulting from automated phone lines and the inability to reach suitable staff at the hospitals.

The issue has now become a political “hot potato” but whether it can be resolved remains to be seen!

The subject chosen today by Margaret Mills was a renowned composer and musician from Tudor times – William Byrd who lived in Stondon Massey and was great friend of the Petre family, notably John Petre son of the first Lord Petre. In spite of his Roman Catholicism, for many years, he also managed to maintain a good relationship with the royalty – notably Queen Elizabeth I. Click on the link below to hear more: –

See you next week,
Scott

Whilst deputising for Michelle Ward last Friday, I had the pleasure of talking with LESLEY BURROWS of St Frances Hospice about HOSPICE CARE WEEK.

As this event is taking place all this week, I thought it would be a good idea to give you a second chance to hear what this is all about and of the many things happening locally.

You can find out more about the week on Hospice UK’s website at http://www.hospiceuk.org/policy-campaigns/campaigns/hospice-care-week, and of course, the latest news from Saint Francis Hospice can be found at sfh.org.uk.

Listen again here to what Lesley told me by clicking on the link below: –

Later in the show today, we heard about the man who cycled 250 miles just to get a supply of his wife’s favourite coffee. Either he must have done something really bad or maybe plans to, and so needed to build up a good supply of “brownie points”.

Right I’m off – but not that far!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

Shenfield High School prides itself on having an outstanding PE Department. In 2012, Ofsted stated that sport at Shenfield High School is “very strong.”
Head of PE Garry Sapsford joined me on the show today to tell us all about the school’s Sports Academy.

Garry Sapsford

You can listen to our chat here –

On last week’s show we heard all about buying and selling property from local estate agent, Nicholas Court and about the chap who went to rent a room in East London only to find that it was a shed in the corner of a room. So if we didn’t know before, we do now that property prices are at ridiculously high levels and in London the situation is even more insane. So much so that today we learnt about the 23 year old Hampshire born student at the University of East London who has found it cheaper to commute from Poland than rent locally! His commuting costs plus rent in Gdansk amount to £2100 per annum whilst rent alone in London would come to £11500. How stupid is that?

Going back to an earlier, less expensive age, Margaret Mills took us back once more to Plotlands, the area that built up close to Basildon before the wars. Listen again to what she had to say this week, by clicking on the link below: –

I’ll see you again next week,
Scott

On today’s programme we heard why the Labour Party might want to put too much “meat on the bone” about their new policies. This followed news that spokesperson on farming has reportedly suggested that meat should be treated in the same way as tobacco with public campaigns aimed at stopping people eating it. Perhaps as a vegan herself, she might want to try to convert others to her way of thinking?

We also heard about the man who was told that a fly damaging his TV screen was an act of God and the damage was not therefore covered by the
guarantee. Marvellous!

See you again tomorrow.
Scott

In what was one of the most entertaining interviews I have ever done, and certainly the easiest, I spoke to Attila The Stockbroker AKA John Baine.

Attila The Stockbroker

Attila The Stockbroker has been a punk poet and musician and songwriter for 35 years. In that time he has performed at over 3000 gigs in 24 countries, published seven books of poems and has been a prolific recording artist.
And what has all this to do with Donny Osmond? Well you’ll have to listen to the interview to find out! You can listen here –

The autobiography “Arguments Yard” is available on Attila’s website here

You can catch Attila in performance supported by Stephen Foster Pilkington at The Blue Boar Hotel in Maldon on 15th October. More details here

Last week I had the pleasure of talking with a local estate agent but in spite of what he told me about rising costs, even that did not prepare me for news of some of the astronomic rates now applying to properties in East London. And today we reported on the recently advertised delights of renting a mattress on the floor of a garden shed installed in the living room of a house in Bethnal Green. A snip apparently at a mere £530 per month!

Margaret Mills took us back to an earlier time when people living in the East End were able to purchase plots of land in and around Basildon for just
£5. Listen to what Margaret told me today about the development known as Plotlands. Just click on the link below:-

I’ll see you again next week,
Scott

We learnt today that an Alabama councillor is seeking divine guidance for a plan to ban the wearing of saggy jeans, trousers and shorts in public.

“ I’ve prayed about this and I know God would not go around with pants down!” Councillor Frank Goodman told a meeting of Dadeville Town Council. Meanwhile Council member, Stephanie Kelley told reporters that they also had to do something about girls wearing shorts up so high that they looking like under garments. She added that the council did not want to show favouritism. Seems like the local girls were keen to show rather more than favouritism!

Now I’m not exactly renowned for my technical know how, so I love it when I hear about people who are really tech savvy falling foul of technology. It seems that last week Microsoft boss, SATYA NADELLA, ran into trouble at a high profile sales conference where he was trying to demonstrate the wonders of their newly released CORTANA voice assistant technology. Unfortunately when he asked it to show him his most at-risk opportunities, to gales of laughter from the assembled audience, it insisted instead on offering to remind him when to buy milk – and not just once either. After three attempts he gave up!

As long as I have not fallen victim to technology in the meantime, I’ll see you again tomorrow,
Scott

For more than 50 years now Shenfield High School has been serving the local area and in that time it has had only 4 headteachers. This year’s batch of GCSE and A level results from the pupils at the school were particularly good, and today I was pleased to be joined by the current Headteacher Carole Herman.

Carole Herman

We spoke about the school, this year’s results, and the school’s forthcoming open evening on 1st October. I also managed to sneak in a track by two talented Shenfield High School students – Daynah Lorelle and Liam Bull – that was recorded at Phoenix last month. You can listen to it all here –

On today’s show we heard about the man who held a knife to the neck of a cashier at his local NatWest Bank and demanded that she deposit £500 into his own account, details of which he obligingly provided. Unsurprisingly she pushed the “panic” button.

Faced with this unhelpful and uncooperative attitude he then tried his luck with the HSBC bank next door only to be arrested minutes later.

In the second hour of the programme Margaret Mills took us back to the 16th century and provided some interesting details of some of the owners of Warley Hall. Listen again to what Margaret told me by clicking on the link below:-

See you next week,
Scott

I was joined today by Nicholas Court from local estate agents, Court & Co who provided an insight into many aspects of buying and selling property. Listen to what he said by
clicking on the link below: –

In the second hour of the show we heard about some of the dangers and pitfalls of social media awaiting the unwary. We all know how easy it is to press “send” in error which can result in embarrassment, but if you are in the public eye, well then you can be made to look a complete idiot. Pity then US Republican presidential hopeful, Donald Trump who was duped into apparently endorsing Jeremy Corbyn’s triumph at being elected leader of Britain’s Labour Party!

See you again tomorrow,
Scott

With the new Rugby union season approaching after the World Cup which begins at the end of next week, Ongar Rugby Football Club are hoping to kick off their season with a bang, and joining me today, was Dave Blake from the club to tell us all about it…

Dave Blake

You can find out all about it, and England’s chances in the forthcoming Rugby World Cup, by listening here –

EDIT: Jesse Hagger from Ongar RFC spoke to us after the event.

He said, “I cannot put into words how pleasantly surprised we were on the day. It was a huge success.”

He’s also sent some pictures, taken by Georgia Walker, which you can see below.