This week it was time for our regular book review by Margaret Mills but sadly Margaret was unable to join me today due to ill health.

Well at least we had a great pool of music to listen to and we also had time to consider a couple of unusual stories.

Now I don’t think that the thought of nuclear war appeals to anyone but it seems that as a result of recent murmurings from Moscow some people have started to issue guidance of what you should do in the event of finding yourself in the midst of a nuclear attack.

Back in the 50’s and 60’s we were told to go and get a tin of white painting cover your windows with the stuff – always assuming of course that you could get to a stockist in time otherwise we were told to turn tables upside down and crouch behind them but now it seems there is another rule of thumb. 

Well first off keep your head down especially if your thumb starts to glow!

Alternatively, if the mushroom cloud from the nuclear bomb can be completely covered by holding out your thumb then you’re probably safe.

While that might be the case, nobody would blame you if you thought it was still safer to turn and run in the other direction to look for somewhere you can find shelter.

If you can’t cover the cloud by sticking out your thumb then it’s time to point yourself in the opposite direction and go as fast as you can towards the most appropriate shelter.

If you hold out your thumb and it starts to melt off right before your eyes then it’s probably time to scoff the contents of your biscuit tin and finally understand why certain bodies found in Pompeii were posed in a certain way.

If at first the blast doesn’t get you, you can pick from a plethora of potential deaths including radiation and starvation, so definitely raid the biscuit tin before the Mad Max wannabes get you for your hobnobs.

If you really want to survive a potential nuclear war then one of your best bets would be to re-locate smartly to Australia.  

While you’d possibly want to stay out of the cities to avoid being one of the many millions who’d be incinerated by the bombs, you could avoid the post-apocalyptic starvation as Australia produces enough food to support their population.

Of course here in Brentwood we could all make a dash to the secret nuclear bunker!

Now if you are fortunate enough to be the proud owner of an i-Phone 14, you may need to be a bit cautious if you take it with you to the fairground.

Why? Well it seems that the phone incorporates a new CAR CRASH DETECTION FEATURE which although designed to detect severe car crashes – such as front-impact, side-impact and rear-end collisions and rollovers’ appears to interpret the kind of movements experienced on rollercoasters as potential accidents. 

Thanks to the built in accelerometers and gyroscope, which measure sudden changes in speed and direction the phone can interpret such as an accident and will immediately launch a 20-second countdown. In theory at this point the user can turn off this feature but if they fail to intervene, the phone will make an automated call to emergency services, saying: “The owner of this iPhone was in a severe car crash and is not responding to their phone.”

Whilst great in theory, it appears this crash detection technology has encountered some bumps in the road.

As a result theme parks in the US have advised users to switch off their mobile phones or put them on flight-safe mode when they go on rides. 

The new feature also resulted in one young man’s mother and girlfriend being mistakenly informed that he had been in a car accident, after dropping his phone off the handlebars of his motorcycle.

An Apple spokesperson stated that the algorithms were ‘extremely accurate in detecting severe crashes’ and had been validated using over a million hours of crash-test data but that inevitably the technology would continue to improve over time.

I look forward to having your company again tomorrow,
Scott