A breakup can be really traumatic for anyone, but it becomes even more difficult if the relationship was long-term. What makes getting over a breakup especially hard is that oftentimes you are left with many unanswered questions. The most common of which is, “What went wrong?” and “Where did I go wrong?”. You constantly try to find some closure, and that’s what keeps you from moving on. No matter what your specific circumstances were, there are some tips on how to feel better.
Start with acceptance
No, that’s not a misprint. It is the first step to get over a breakup. For you to move on from your past relationship, you have to accept that it ended and there wasn’t anything more or less you could have done about it. It may be more challenging if the other part still wants to get back and make things right this time. However, it is crucial to recognize the signs your ex wants you back and make sure you don’t fall back into the same trap. The sooner you let go of the illusion that if only something was different, things would be working out between you and your ex-partner, the faster you can begin healing.
Figure out why you want to move on
It’s not enough just to accept it; you need to figure out exactly what pushed the two of you apart in the first place, and what led up to your breakup. After all, if there was a specific action or event that made your relationship fall apart, that specific factor is what will help you get over it. It’s important to figure out the root of the problem to resolve whatever issues are there. Once you can pinpoint why things went wrong, you can determine whether or not those issues were within both of your control and if they could have been fixed.
Don’t blame yourself or your ex
It’s important to understand that it takes two people to make a relationship work out, and no one is perfect. No matter what went wrong in your relationship, you don’t want to blame yourself and dwell on the past because that will only cause you more stress and anxiety and prevent you from moving on. Also, it is very important not to blame your ex either; you want to acknowledge that he or she was a big part of your life and you still care about him or her because just as much as you’re hurting now, they are too.
Realize that it will get better with time
It’s never easy to get over a breakup because it is the end of an experience that has affected you significantly. However, you need to keep in mind that things can only get better with time and constant effort. You’re probably thinking that you’ll never feel better again, but believe me, this will pass eventually. Don’t expect your feelings of loneliness or emptiness to be gone forever right away. These are symptoms of having lost someone important to you which take time to subside. The more persistent you are in getting back up on your feet instead of dwelling on what could have been, the faster you’ll recover from your past relationship.
Surround yourself with better people
It’s important to realize that the people you’re surrounding yourself with are an important factor in your overall happiness. It can be difficult to feel better after a breakup if all your friends and family don’t really care for you because they only make you think about what happened more. So, focus on building new friendships or nurturing old ones that will help support and comfort you as you go through this trying time. The people you surround yourself with are what will determine how well you recover, so make sure they’re not dragging you down.
Keep yourself busy
No matter how much you feel like wallowing in self-pity, it’s important to continue with life as normal. That doesn’t mean that you need to go out all of the time or dive into your work without thinking about what happened; it just means that it is okay to take a day off every once in a while and distract yourself with something fun. The best thing for you might be to do something productive, but if you’re not feeling up for that right now then don’t push yourself too hard. You should always listen to your body because taking care of yourself will make your recovery smoother and easier.
Get rid of the reminders
Once you stop dwelling on your breakup, start taking steps to get all of your memories out of your life. This doesn’t mean that you should delete him or her from your phone or social media, but it does mean that you need to get rid of the mementos and objects in your life that constantly remind you of them, especially anything connected with happiness in the relationship. If something is making things worse for you, then it’s time to let go. The same goes for any other things that are tangibly connected to your ex, like gifts or trips you’ve taken together.
Give yourself time before dating again
It’s perfectly normal to get back out there and start seeing other people in order to move on from a breakup, but you want to do so when you’re ready. You can’t force yourself into starting a new relationship in an effort to feel better because it won’t work nearly as well as if you were truly ready for it. It takes time to recover from a negative situation, so just focus on feeling better rather than rushing into things that might hurt you even more in the long run. This is because there are plenty of guys or girls out there who will want to take advantage of your vulnerability. They might seem like the perfect person at first, but that’s usually not the case. It may just take a little more time, but the right person will come along when you least expect it.
While there are many more things you can do, these are just some of the most basic steps to help you feel better after a breakup. The trick is not to expect too much from yourself too soon because that will only make it harder for you to move on. Just keep in mind that the sooner you accept the situation and start working on getting over your ex-partner, the sooner you can put this behind you and continue with your life.