At long last the weather picked up a bit today so today’s edition of EAT MY LUNCH took place under partly sunny skies.

I found myself deputising for Michelle once more today so once again I used the opportunity to scour PHOENIX FM’s department of weird and whacky news to see what I could uncover.

If you’ve ever seen the film THE GREAT ESCAPE you will know how two British escapees were caught when they replied in English to a “good luck” wish proffered by a suspicious Gestapo officer. Well presumably a Punjabi Post Office manager from Sheffield hadn’t seen that film since after he had successfully convinced authorities for over 2 years that he should not be prosecuted for stealing over £400,000 by virtue of a mental condition preventing him from speaking, was similarly caught out when a psychiatrist wished him luck in his native language! His power of speech was then miraculously restored when he thanked the doctor. He also spoke in court to enter his guilty plea.

If you have just cleaned your house, maybe you were thinking that your vacuum cleaner had seen better days. Well help is at hand with the launch of a new special edition vacuum cleaner. So special in fact that only 100 machines exist and at £640,000 each, are unlikely to be flying off the shelves. Why the high price? Well they are 24-carat gold plated and probably weigh a considerable amount. You certainly wouldn’t want to drop one on your foot!The question must be asked, if you were spending that much on a vacuum cleaner, it seems unlikely that you would be doing your own cleaning!

And for our final tale today, a US government agency has been forced to issue an official denial that mermaids exist. This follows the broadcasting of an apparent documentary “MERMAIDS – THE BODY FOUND” on the Discovery channel’s Animal Planet network. The Discovery Chanel later acknowledged that the format of the programme might have led some viewers to believe it was a science education show. Shades of Orson Welles famous WAR OF THE WORLDS radio broadcast in 1938 which resulted in panic across much of the USA, with thousands of people convinced that Earth was under attack by the Martians. Some people will believe anything!

I’ll be back on this show on Thursday with some more truly oddball stories. Look forward to your company at 11am.

All the best,

Scott